By Jonathan Boyd
Moving to a new city can be an exciting time - you've got a new home, perhaps a new job too, and now there are plenty of things you want to explore. But even in a city with millions, you might feel lonely if you haven't got any friends to share your new experiences with. The solution? Be proactive! Don't sit around your home and wait for people to find you...instead, follow these seven tips for finding good friends in a new city:
1. Get to know your neighbors. If you live in a community which hosts regular meetings or events, make an effort to be involved. Knowing people who live around you is always a help and makes your neighborhood a more social place.
2. Join a club or class relating to a subject or hobby that interests you, e.g., a dance class, hockey team or painting course. This helps you get out and meet people who share similar interests to you - a good starting point for any friendship.
3. Take part in a running club. Most cities organize groups who train together and all levels are welcome. It's one way to stay fit and you'll socialize by chatting as you run, too.
4. If you have a dog, take it out for a walk where other dog-owners in the area go. Popular dog walking areas are always great places to meet other dog-owners - it's hard not to admire each other's pets and swap pet-owning stories.
5. Volunteer to do something helpful. There are always places looking for help like soup kitchens or child-mentoring organizations. You'll benefit your community and are sure to come in contact with lots of people - especially like-minded ones who want to make a difference too.
6. Check your local newspaper for local events - there may be a new cafe opening or a new exhibition at the museum. Just because you haven't made any friends yet, it shouldn't be an excuse to stay indoors. The more you go out, the more likely you are to meet someone new...even if you don't, and at least you've been out and enjoyed yourself.
7. Make use of great websites for meeting people. They help you meet other people in your local area who also want to make friends, share interests, or network for business or social purposes. If you don't find a group you'd like to join, you could even use the site to start one yourself!
If you enjoyed this article, please feel free to post it to your site or blog and forward this link to your friends. Have a great day!
By Jonathan Boyd
Monday, August 31, 2009
What to Do When a Friend Betrays You
By Kare Anderson
Last month two friends broke trust. One offered to do something vital, didn't and didn't tell me. Another shared private information about me with a stranger. I don't know which felt worse. I do know it's a sign to re-learn lessons. Remember when you felt betrayed?
"Trust is the glue that holds relationships together." ~ Price Pritchett
Recall that hot flush of recognition when you first realized that someone you knew would act one way and didn't? What to do? How not to become bitter or wary? Funny how one betrayal is closely followed by another wrenching experience -- or so it seems. Even if one's life is on a fairly even keel, one trust-breaker situation makes the second one hit harder- if we let it.
"Sometimes you cannot believe what you see; you have to believe what you feel. And if you are ever going to have other people trust you, you must feel that you can trust them, too -- even when you're in the dark. Even when you are falling.~ Morrie Schwartz, quoted in Tuesdays With Morrie by Mitch Albom.
My first reaction was to re-run the wrenching situation in my mind, over and over, digging a deeper rut in my memory. Dumb, right? Those scenes dominated my thoughts more than the recent, joyful times. Consequently I viewed others through a cautious, constricted-heart lens. That begets a self-fulfilling prophecy. People feel put off.
"No idea will work if people don't trust your intentions toward them." ~ Marcus Buckingham, Now, Discover Your Strengths
We've all faced mind-grabbing breaks of trust, and will again. Conversely, we have betrayed another's trust and dodged rather than rectified the situation.
"You may be deceived if you trust too much, but you will live in torment if you don't trust enough." ~ Frank H. Crane
For more than a decade, I've studied, taught, and written about focusing attention on the positive parts of every interaction. Yet, like breathing, it isn't a one-time practice.
"Character is what you really are. Reputation is what people say you are. A person of character is trustworthy. The other kind looks for an easy way out." ~ John Wooden
Getting back to equilibrium means letting go of a better past. Every negative action comes from the root feeling of fear.
"Trust is the heartbeat of every significant relationship" ~ Cynthia L. Wall and Sue Patton Thoel
That does not mean we have to stand in the street and let the same car hit us again. The next time you lose trust, try taking these steps forward towards equanimity for yourself:
1. Let the full emotional effect of the betrayal sink in and don't re-run the scene more than three times.
2. Step into the other person's shoes to see the interaction their way. Is this a pattern in his behavior towards you or is it an anomaly?
3. Look to the part of that person's potentially positive intent, especially when he appeared to have none in that situation. You will see the whole picture more clearly and calmly.
4. Praise the part of that person's behavior you want to reinforce and to flourish. (Ironically, this is one of your most self-protective tools in such moments.)
5. Ask her for a time to talk. Then, in factual, non-blaming language, describe the specific behavior that bothered you. Next describe your feelings. Then wait for a response.
6. Listen closely and with an open heart and mind to the answer. If your picture of her actions was accurate, and if she is solely defensive -without offering a change in behavior, then you have learned a lot.
7. If someone breaks trust with you twice it is highly likely there'll be a third time so why place yourself in that position? My friend, Paul Geffner says we gather many friends and acquaintances over our lifetime. The key to living well with them is to recognize the right distance in which to hold them. Those you enjoy and trust you bring closer.
Asking someone to change behavior after you have described its ill effects on you, will seldom lead to positive change. More likely it will engender defensiveness and avoidance. Unfortunately, the relative power in the situation (who needs whom the most) will determine how you two communicate in the future. But it doesn't have to determine the safe distance you choose to have with that person.
8. Choose your distance. You always have three choices in any situation: Change how you act towards that person, accept her behavior or leave (avoid future contact.)
"No idea will work if people don't trust your intentions toward them." ~ Marcus Buckingham, Now, Discover Your Strengths
The lesson: Sooner, rather than later, take these steps. Choose what you can do positively for yourself rather than against another. The more quickly you'll climb out of that negative "re-run" rut of thoughts and toward the positive part of that person, the more likely you'll return to an even keel - and the more likely you'll be able to preserve a properly distanced relationship.
Last month two friends broke trust. One offered to do something vital, didn't and didn't tell me. Another shared private information about me with a stranger. I don't know which felt worse. I do know it's a sign to re-learn lessons. Remember when you felt betrayed?
"Trust is the glue that holds relationships together." ~ Price Pritchett
Recall that hot flush of recognition when you first realized that someone you knew would act one way and didn't? What to do? How not to become bitter or wary? Funny how one betrayal is closely followed by another wrenching experience -- or so it seems. Even if one's life is on a fairly even keel, one trust-breaker situation makes the second one hit harder- if we let it.
"Sometimes you cannot believe what you see; you have to believe what you feel. And if you are ever going to have other people trust you, you must feel that you can trust them, too -- even when you're in the dark. Even when you are falling.~ Morrie Schwartz, quoted in Tuesdays With Morrie by Mitch Albom.
My first reaction was to re-run the wrenching situation in my mind, over and over, digging a deeper rut in my memory. Dumb, right? Those scenes dominated my thoughts more than the recent, joyful times. Consequently I viewed others through a cautious, constricted-heart lens. That begets a self-fulfilling prophecy. People feel put off.
"No idea will work if people don't trust your intentions toward them." ~ Marcus Buckingham, Now, Discover Your Strengths
We've all faced mind-grabbing breaks of trust, and will again. Conversely, we have betrayed another's trust and dodged rather than rectified the situation.
"You may be deceived if you trust too much, but you will live in torment if you don't trust enough." ~ Frank H. Crane
For more than a decade, I've studied, taught, and written about focusing attention on the positive parts of every interaction. Yet, like breathing, it isn't a one-time practice.
"Character is what you really are. Reputation is what people say you are. A person of character is trustworthy. The other kind looks for an easy way out." ~ John Wooden
Getting back to equilibrium means letting go of a better past. Every negative action comes from the root feeling of fear.
"Trust is the heartbeat of every significant relationship" ~ Cynthia L. Wall and Sue Patton Thoel
That does not mean we have to stand in the street and let the same car hit us again. The next time you lose trust, try taking these steps forward towards equanimity for yourself:
1. Let the full emotional effect of the betrayal sink in and don't re-run the scene more than three times.
2. Step into the other person's shoes to see the interaction their way. Is this a pattern in his behavior towards you or is it an anomaly?
3. Look to the part of that person's potentially positive intent, especially when he appeared to have none in that situation. You will see the whole picture more clearly and calmly.
4. Praise the part of that person's behavior you want to reinforce and to flourish. (Ironically, this is one of your most self-protective tools in such moments.)
5. Ask her for a time to talk. Then, in factual, non-blaming language, describe the specific behavior that bothered you. Next describe your feelings. Then wait for a response.
6. Listen closely and with an open heart and mind to the answer. If your picture of her actions was accurate, and if she is solely defensive -without offering a change in behavior, then you have learned a lot.
7. If someone breaks trust with you twice it is highly likely there'll be a third time so why place yourself in that position? My friend, Paul Geffner says we gather many friends and acquaintances over our lifetime. The key to living well with them is to recognize the right distance in which to hold them. Those you enjoy and trust you bring closer.
Asking someone to change behavior after you have described its ill effects on you, will seldom lead to positive change. More likely it will engender defensiveness and avoidance. Unfortunately, the relative power in the situation (who needs whom the most) will determine how you two communicate in the future. But it doesn't have to determine the safe distance you choose to have with that person.
8. Choose your distance. You always have three choices in any situation: Change how you act towards that person, accept her behavior or leave (avoid future contact.)
"No idea will work if people don't trust your intentions toward them." ~ Marcus Buckingham, Now, Discover Your Strengths
The lesson: Sooner, rather than later, take these steps. Choose what you can do positively for yourself rather than against another. The more quickly you'll climb out of that negative "re-run" rut of thoughts and toward the positive part of that person, the more likely you'll return to an even keel - and the more likely you'll be able to preserve a properly distanced relationship.
Becoming Your Best Self - How to Be a Good Neighbor
Be friendly, but not a pain in the butt. You don't want your neighbors to hide when they see you coming. Feel free to wave or smile, but read their response to your efforts to see how welcome your advances are. You also don't want to start out all Chatty Cathy if you like to keep a distance yourself. Once you've both passed the 'acquaintance line', there is no going back.
Return all their stuff quickly and in the same (or better) condition.Good neighbors allow nearby residents they trust to borrow tools or other implements. Whatever the tool is, the best way to maintain that trust is to bring the item back promptly and clean and ready to go. Your neighbor should never have to clean a tool you've borrowed.
Keep your pets on your property. While our neighbors are our neighbors, our pets are family. However, it's important to remember that not all people are pet people. And whether they enjoy or own pets themselves, your neighbors have no interest in cleaning up after your pets in their yard. Do whatever you need to do to keep your pets on your property.
Make sure your outside fits in with your neighbors' front yards. If every other yard is clean and spruce, you don't want to be the one with an overgrown lawn. While most people in our neighborhood keep their lawns trimmed, there is one person across the street who never seems to cut their grass. Trust me, most people spend time wishing she would move out and sell the house to someone with more house pride.
Be grateful for favors performed by your neighbors. Remember, they don't owe you or need to do it. Whatever favor they perform, they are doing it to be neighborly. So either return the favor in kind or surprise them with a gift certificate to a local eatery. You'll be glad you did when you ask them to do you another favor.
Mind your own business and respect their privacy. This is the number one rule to follow to be considered a good neighbor. No one likes a nosey Parker! Especially one that lives next door. Respect their privacy and they'll respect yours!
Keep sugar on hand for borrowing! (or at least a sugar substitute!)It's a time-honored tradition to borrow a cup of sugar. I have no idea where it originated, but there's no sense messing with history. I'd hate to have a neighbor come to the door with an empty cup and go away without their favorite sweetener!
Return all their stuff quickly and in the same (or better) condition.Good neighbors allow nearby residents they trust to borrow tools or other implements. Whatever the tool is, the best way to maintain that trust is to bring the item back promptly and clean and ready to go. Your neighbor should never have to clean a tool you've borrowed.
Keep your pets on your property. While our neighbors are our neighbors, our pets are family. However, it's important to remember that not all people are pet people. And whether they enjoy or own pets themselves, your neighbors have no interest in cleaning up after your pets in their yard. Do whatever you need to do to keep your pets on your property.
Make sure your outside fits in with your neighbors' front yards. If every other yard is clean and spruce, you don't want to be the one with an overgrown lawn. While most people in our neighborhood keep their lawns trimmed, there is one person across the street who never seems to cut their grass. Trust me, most people spend time wishing she would move out and sell the house to someone with more house pride.
Be grateful for favors performed by your neighbors. Remember, they don't owe you or need to do it. Whatever favor they perform, they are doing it to be neighborly. So either return the favor in kind or surprise them with a gift certificate to a local eatery. You'll be glad you did when you ask them to do you another favor.
Mind your own business and respect their privacy. This is the number one rule to follow to be considered a good neighbor. No one likes a nosey Parker! Especially one that lives next door. Respect their privacy and they'll respect yours!
Keep sugar on hand for borrowing! (or at least a sugar substitute!)It's a time-honored tradition to borrow a cup of sugar. I have no idea where it originated, but there's no sense messing with history. I'd hate to have a neighbor come to the door with an empty cup and go away without their favorite sweetener!
Friday, August 28, 2009
10 Creative Ways to Bond a Friendship
By Krystalina Soash
Male or female friendships are valuable and sometimes friendships can be taken for granted. Fortunately, there are some things you can do to bond that friendship. Following are just ten creative ways to do just that.
Ten Creative Ways to Bond a Friendship
1. Join a Social Group: It may be a reading, recreational, music, biking, hiking, or just a good clean fun group that doesn't give out homework.
2. Take a Class Together: Whether it's for academic or fun purposes it's great to take a class with a friend. You can compare notes and have fun doing it.
3. Do Volunteer Work: Offer to go as a team to help out at a reading group, helping kids with homework, bagging food at a food shelf, or shelving books at your local library.
4. Go to a Movie: Going to a movie together is a positive experience because you both see the movie at the same time and you can talk about it right after.
5. Take up a Hobby: Taking up a hobby together can be a lot of fun. Just remember not to turn your hobby into a job. Landscaping and gardening make fun hobbies.
6. Visit Someone in the Hospital: Walking in together to visit someone you both know can take off that uneasiness you may feel when walking into a hospital. Cheer somebody up.
7. Take Early Morning Walks: If you live within a short distance of each other, a morning walk on a nature trail can be very invigorating and bonding while your mind is still clear.
8. Share Your Goals: Sharing your goals with a friend is helpful because you are held accountable for your goals and can also bounce ideas regarding your goals.
9. Watch a Documentary: Watching a documentary together can be quite enlightening. You get to admit to each other what you didn't know about the topic. Learn together.
10. Visit the Zoo: Visiting the Zoo with a friend can be a fantastic way to enjoy a full day of learning new things about animals, besides, seeing new species with someone is fun.
The best part of doing these types of creative activities with your friend, is that years down the road you will still be talking about what you did together and you'll be saying, "Remember when..." This is the greatest reward of bonding with a friend.
By Krystalina Soash
Male or female friendships are valuable and sometimes friendships can be taken for granted. Fortunately, there are some things you can do to bond that friendship. Following are just ten creative ways to do just that.
Ten Creative Ways to Bond a Friendship
1. Join a Social Group: It may be a reading, recreational, music, biking, hiking, or just a good clean fun group that doesn't give out homework.
2. Take a Class Together: Whether it's for academic or fun purposes it's great to take a class with a friend. You can compare notes and have fun doing it.
3. Do Volunteer Work: Offer to go as a team to help out at a reading group, helping kids with homework, bagging food at a food shelf, or shelving books at your local library.
4. Go to a Movie: Going to a movie together is a positive experience because you both see the movie at the same time and you can talk about it right after.
5. Take up a Hobby: Taking up a hobby together can be a lot of fun. Just remember not to turn your hobby into a job. Landscaping and gardening make fun hobbies.
6. Visit Someone in the Hospital: Walking in together to visit someone you both know can take off that uneasiness you may feel when walking into a hospital. Cheer somebody up.
7. Take Early Morning Walks: If you live within a short distance of each other, a morning walk on a nature trail can be very invigorating and bonding while your mind is still clear.
8. Share Your Goals: Sharing your goals with a friend is helpful because you are held accountable for your goals and can also bounce ideas regarding your goals.
9. Watch a Documentary: Watching a documentary together can be quite enlightening. You get to admit to each other what you didn't know about the topic. Learn together.
10. Visit the Zoo: Visiting the Zoo with a friend can be a fantastic way to enjoy a full day of learning new things about animals, besides, seeing new species with someone is fun.
The best part of doing these types of creative activities with your friend, is that years down the road you will still be talking about what you did together and you'll be saying, "Remember when..." This is the greatest reward of bonding with a friend.
By Krystalina Soash
Turn Enemies Into Friends
By David Z
Imagine all the enemies in your life converted to rewarding, lasting friendships, wouldn't that be something? How many more friends would you have? How would that change your outlook on life? Obviously, only positive outcomes could occur, but is it possible? You'll be surprised to find that not only is it possible, but easy and even fun! Here are some tips to convert your most despised enemies into long lasting friendships.
Discuss with them, things that neutral. Avoid topics that may lead to why you two aren't friends in the first place. Discuss things that don't contribute to a mutual hatred. Try to talk about things that they are good at. Complement them for what they have achieved. This conveys that there is little hostility felt by you. If you keep a respectful manor, no matter what happened in the past, your rival will do the same. But be sure not to be too nice or it will seem like you have no intention of becoming building a friendship, rather, simply condescending or teasing them.
Discuss something that is a shared passion between the two of you. (If you both like: pets, sports, etc.). Nothing will unite two people as a mutual passion for something will. There will always be something you two feel similarly about even if it doesn't seem like it.
Ask for their advice. Not only does this help with making enemies, friends, it can be used to make friends in general. Asking for advice from someone displays a deep sentiment of trust and respect for the recipient.
Make sure, when they are not around, you maintain the same level of respect you would if they were standing right next to you. Do not speak negatively about them to other people, try to avoid the topic of your enemy altogether but if forced, be sure to speak only positively. The worst thing that can happened when starting a new friendship is for them to hear your gossips, especially from others.
Treat them as you would any other friend, this means telling jokes, showing empathy, etc. Act normal. This will make them feel as though you two have been friends for a long time and will allow them to forget the differences in the past.
After they have become a relatively trusted and close friend, tell that you are sorry for what happened in the past and that you hope that you two could put it all behind. At this stage, they will likely follow suit. Create a productive friendship. Invite them over for a family gathering, a barbeque. Invite them to go camping. The possibilities are endless. By doing this, you are ensuring that the friendship endures for many years.
There you have it, you are now ready to convert your most hated enemies into your most trusted friends.
David is an avid article writer and has been working in IM world for many years.
By David Z
Imagine all the enemies in your life converted to rewarding, lasting friendships, wouldn't that be something? How many more friends would you have? How would that change your outlook on life? Obviously, only positive outcomes could occur, but is it possible? You'll be surprised to find that not only is it possible, but easy and even fun! Here are some tips to convert your most despised enemies into long lasting friendships.
Discuss with them, things that neutral. Avoid topics that may lead to why you two aren't friends in the first place. Discuss things that don't contribute to a mutual hatred. Try to talk about things that they are good at. Complement them for what they have achieved. This conveys that there is little hostility felt by you. If you keep a respectful manor, no matter what happened in the past, your rival will do the same. But be sure not to be too nice or it will seem like you have no intention of becoming building a friendship, rather, simply condescending or teasing them.
Discuss something that is a shared passion between the two of you. (If you both like: pets, sports, etc.). Nothing will unite two people as a mutual passion for something will. There will always be something you two feel similarly about even if it doesn't seem like it.
Ask for their advice. Not only does this help with making enemies, friends, it can be used to make friends in general. Asking for advice from someone displays a deep sentiment of trust and respect for the recipient.
Make sure, when they are not around, you maintain the same level of respect you would if they were standing right next to you. Do not speak negatively about them to other people, try to avoid the topic of your enemy altogether but if forced, be sure to speak only positively. The worst thing that can happened when starting a new friendship is for them to hear your gossips, especially from others.
Treat them as you would any other friend, this means telling jokes, showing empathy, etc. Act normal. This will make them feel as though you two have been friends for a long time and will allow them to forget the differences in the past.
After they have become a relatively trusted and close friend, tell that you are sorry for what happened in the past and that you hope that you two could put it all behind. At this stage, they will likely follow suit. Create a productive friendship. Invite them over for a family gathering, a barbeque. Invite them to go camping. The possibilities are endless. By doing this, you are ensuring that the friendship endures for many years.
There you have it, you are now ready to convert your most hated enemies into your most trusted friends.
David is an avid article writer and has been working in IM world for many years.
By David Z
Tuesday, August 25, 2009
Can a Marriage Survive an Affair
By Douglas Quinn
Sometimes couples find themselves asking each other "can our marriage survive an affair?" And that is a difficult question to answer. There are so many factors that are involved in determining if a marriage can work when an affair has caused waves within the marriage. It really depends on the couple and the circumstances that caused the affair. Did the husband go outside the marriage bed to look for a one night stand? Or did the wife start with holding sexual relations because of an illness or out of spite for her spouse. Or maybe the affair happened because the wife was weak, in mental anguish and was looking for something that her spouse could not provide her a warm shoulder to cry on.
When it comes down to the survival of a marriage, it does not matter if the action in question is an affair, financial woos or just plain discontent for each other. Every marriage can be repaired if both spouses are willing to start at square one and start rebuilding the marriage block by block.
Here are a few tips to help you rebuild your marriage
• Start communicating with each other. Sit down and start a conversation about the affair. Take turns talking by using an egg timer. If it is your turn to listen, do just that. Do not break in on the conversation to correct your spouse. Let them vent then you will get your turn after their 5 minutes is up. Keep the conversation smooth and calm. No finger pointing. Use this time to try to identify why the affair happened and how the both of you can make sure that it will never happen again.
• Forgive each other. This is the hardest part of the process, but it is the most important. How is your marriage going to be able to continue if there is no forgiveness? You can forgive without putting your trust on the table. Simply acknowledge that you understand why the affair happened and that you forgive your spouse. Your trust will need to be earned back slowly.
• Find the romance again. Now this can be the fun part of the process. Go out on dates and get to know each other again. Remember that you are both human and we all need some time to reconnect with our spouses. Work together to find that spark that the two of you once had for each other prior to your wedding day
By Douglas Quinn
Sometimes couples find themselves asking each other "can our marriage survive an affair?" And that is a difficult question to answer. There are so many factors that are involved in determining if a marriage can work when an affair has caused waves within the marriage. It really depends on the couple and the circumstances that caused the affair. Did the husband go outside the marriage bed to look for a one night stand? Or did the wife start with holding sexual relations because of an illness or out of spite for her spouse. Or maybe the affair happened because the wife was weak, in mental anguish and was looking for something that her spouse could not provide her a warm shoulder to cry on.
When it comes down to the survival of a marriage, it does not matter if the action in question is an affair, financial woos or just plain discontent for each other. Every marriage can be repaired if both spouses are willing to start at square one and start rebuilding the marriage block by block.
Here are a few tips to help you rebuild your marriage
• Start communicating with each other. Sit down and start a conversation about the affair. Take turns talking by using an egg timer. If it is your turn to listen, do just that. Do not break in on the conversation to correct your spouse. Let them vent then you will get your turn after their 5 minutes is up. Keep the conversation smooth and calm. No finger pointing. Use this time to try to identify why the affair happened and how the both of you can make sure that it will never happen again.
• Forgive each other. This is the hardest part of the process, but it is the most important. How is your marriage going to be able to continue if there is no forgiveness? You can forgive without putting your trust on the table. Simply acknowledge that you understand why the affair happened and that you forgive your spouse. Your trust will need to be earned back slowly.
• Find the romance again. Now this can be the fun part of the process. Go out on dates and get to know each other again. Remember that you are both human and we all need some time to reconnect with our spouses. Work together to find that spark that the two of you once had for each other prior to your wedding day
By Douglas Quinn
Infidelity Signs - Learning the Signs of Infidelity
By Travis S
Statistics showed that half or men's population who suspects that their partner is cheating is correct and almost 90% of women who recognize infidelity signs are right. Given these numbers, one can actually say that women are almost always right when they see signs of infidelity on their partners. If you are out looking for the signs, you can take a look below and see if it applies.
Seemingly endless business trips - The most common situation where infidelity occurs is when it presents itself. If you notice him having business trips almost every week and it seems to be endless, chances are this is already one of the infidelity signs you should be watching for.
Habitual absence from home - He always manages to find excuses to stay away from home. Late conferences, over time work, last minute meeting, seminars, etc. When this absence from home becomes a habit, there is a greater chance that he is cheating on you.
Everything becomes suddenly mysterious - His phone is off-limits. He has credit cards you absolutely know nothing about. He turns off computer as soon as he senses someone is coming. He doesn't let you hear when he is talking on his phone. These are simple things but are significant when learning the signs of infidelity.
Refusal to be picked up from airport - For any particular excuse he makes up, he refuses to let you pick him up from the airport even when it is the most convenient thing to do. Usually, the reason behind this is because he is actually not at the airport.
Different smell from his clothes - Have you ever done the laundry and smelled different smell from his clothes aside from his usual perfume? You can almost tell that it is one of the signs. In fact, it is one of the common signs.
It doesn't really matter how you read infidelity signs but whether you accept the truth or not, always remember that people can lie but numbers don't. If you think that almost 90% of all women who notices these signs are wrong, it is all up to you.
How do you discover signs of infidelity and catch a cheating spouse within seconds? There are efficient ways and methods you could learn in order for you to uncover the truth and reveal his secret. You can guarantee that the results are positive and certainly you do not want to close your door on this opportunity
By Travis S
Statistics showed that half or men's population who suspects that their partner is cheating is correct and almost 90% of women who recognize infidelity signs are right. Given these numbers, one can actually say that women are almost always right when they see signs of infidelity on their partners. If you are out looking for the signs, you can take a look below and see if it applies.
Seemingly endless business trips - The most common situation where infidelity occurs is when it presents itself. If you notice him having business trips almost every week and it seems to be endless, chances are this is already one of the infidelity signs you should be watching for.
Habitual absence from home - He always manages to find excuses to stay away from home. Late conferences, over time work, last minute meeting, seminars, etc. When this absence from home becomes a habit, there is a greater chance that he is cheating on you.
Everything becomes suddenly mysterious - His phone is off-limits. He has credit cards you absolutely know nothing about. He turns off computer as soon as he senses someone is coming. He doesn't let you hear when he is talking on his phone. These are simple things but are significant when learning the signs of infidelity.
Refusal to be picked up from airport - For any particular excuse he makes up, he refuses to let you pick him up from the airport even when it is the most convenient thing to do. Usually, the reason behind this is because he is actually not at the airport.
Different smell from his clothes - Have you ever done the laundry and smelled different smell from his clothes aside from his usual perfume? You can almost tell that it is one of the signs. In fact, it is one of the common signs.
It doesn't really matter how you read infidelity signs but whether you accept the truth or not, always remember that people can lie but numbers don't. If you think that almost 90% of all women who notices these signs are wrong, it is all up to you.
How do you discover signs of infidelity and catch a cheating spouse within seconds? There are efficient ways and methods you could learn in order for you to uncover the truth and reveal his secret. You can guarantee that the results are positive and certainly you do not want to close your door on this opportunity
By Travis S
Friday, August 21, 2009
How to Deal With Rude Neighbors
By Adrienne Manson
Firstly use love. Always greet your neighbor with genuine love although their goal may be to be confrontational. Love does conquer all.
Long-Suffering. Learn to use long-suffering. Usually individuals who are difficult or rude comes from a seed of bitterness within, which they are refusing to deal with. You must be able to demonstrate long-suffering when living next to difficult neighbors.
Gentleness. Use gentleness during the moments when your rude neighbor gives you "the attitude". When they see your gentleness they will learn "the attitude" is not working for them. Faith. It is going to take your faith in action to believe there is a good person inside your rude neighbor. The faith you have is what they need in order to receive assistance in finding his/her way out of rudeness.
Peace. Having a spirit of peace radiating and exuding from your presence can be felt by those around you rude as well as kind-hearted neighbors. Having peace within you will be the most helpful resource when your neighbor is at his/her worst.
Lastly, being patient is the most important factor. Dealing with rude and/or difficult people is always a challenge. One thought to keep in mind is to know a rude person has either been hurt, and/or wronged by a close friend, and in some cases a family member. Rude individual tend to hold on to bitterness, and are resentful toward everyone. Whatever they say to you that is unkind never take it personally, in most cases it is the only way they know how to handle their hurt.
Patience will take you a long way, as the old saying goes patience is a virtue.
By Adrienne Manson
Firstly use love. Always greet your neighbor with genuine love although their goal may be to be confrontational. Love does conquer all.
Long-Suffering. Learn to use long-suffering. Usually individuals who are difficult or rude comes from a seed of bitterness within, which they are refusing to deal with. You must be able to demonstrate long-suffering when living next to difficult neighbors.
Gentleness. Use gentleness during the moments when your rude neighbor gives you "the attitude". When they see your gentleness they will learn "the attitude" is not working for them. Faith. It is going to take your faith in action to believe there is a good person inside your rude neighbor. The faith you have is what they need in order to receive assistance in finding his/her way out of rudeness.
Peace. Having a spirit of peace radiating and exuding from your presence can be felt by those around you rude as well as kind-hearted neighbors. Having peace within you will be the most helpful resource when your neighbor is at his/her worst.
Lastly, being patient is the most important factor. Dealing with rude and/or difficult people is always a challenge. One thought to keep in mind is to know a rude person has either been hurt, and/or wronged by a close friend, and in some cases a family member. Rude individual tend to hold on to bitterness, and are resentful toward everyone. Whatever they say to you that is unkind never take it personally, in most cases it is the only way they know how to handle their hurt.
Patience will take you a long way, as the old saying goes patience is a virtue.
By Adrienne Manson
The Process and Barriers of Communication
By Dawn Ardent
By Dawn Ardent
The process of communication
We often ignore the process of communication and focus only on the meaning of some of the words being carried. The process of communication can be simplified thus:
the speaker formulates his thoughts to himself
the speaker finds words to describe and encode his thoughts with
the speaker transfers the words to the listener through air by speaking
the listener recognizes and decodes the words
the listener assigns meanings to the words based on past experience Simple, isn't it? It is important to understand the process of communication, because communication can become distorted and erroneous at any of those steps. If the process of communication is repeated many times, the probability of errors is reduced - the speaker and the listener can achieve an accord of mutual understanding. Remember that communication is never complete or infallible, but can only be reliable to a satisfactory degree.
Barriers of communication
There are two main barriers of communication: unwillingness to communicate and inability to communicate.
If one of the participants is unwilling to communicate, it is obvious that communication will fail to be. Another, less obvious barrier of communication is when a participant is unwilling to understand, or worse yet, unwilling to tolerate emotionally. Such unwillingness often stems from subconscious fears.
Inability to communicate can be present because of obvious physical reasons (eg. you can't send an email if your internet connection is down). However, inability to communicate can also be present because the speaker does not understand his thoughts sufficiently or otherwise fails to formulate them into words. Such inability often stems from insufficient understanding of oneself.
There can be plenty of barriers of communication, and in case of a breakdown of communication analyzing the barriers can point to a helpful solution.
By Dawn Ardent
The process of communication
We often ignore the process of communication and focus only on the meaning of some of the words being carried. The process of communication can be simplified thus:
the speaker formulates his thoughts to himself
the speaker finds words to describe and encode his thoughts with
the speaker transfers the words to the listener through air by speaking
the listener recognizes and decodes the words
the listener assigns meanings to the words based on past experience Simple, isn't it? It is important to understand the process of communication, because communication can become distorted and erroneous at any of those steps. If the process of communication is repeated many times, the probability of errors is reduced - the speaker and the listener can achieve an accord of mutual understanding. Remember that communication is never complete or infallible, but can only be reliable to a satisfactory degree.
Barriers of communication
There are two main barriers of communication: unwillingness to communicate and inability to communicate.
If one of the participants is unwilling to communicate, it is obvious that communication will fail to be. Another, less obvious barrier of communication is when a participant is unwilling to understand, or worse yet, unwilling to tolerate emotionally. Such unwillingness often stems from subconscious fears.
Inability to communicate can be present because of obvious physical reasons (eg. you can't send an email if your internet connection is down). However, inability to communicate can also be present because the speaker does not understand his thoughts sufficiently or otherwise fails to formulate them into words. Such inability often stems from insufficient understanding of oneself.
There can be plenty of barriers of communication, and in case of a breakdown of communication analyzing the barriers can point to a helpful solution.
Thursday, August 20, 2009
Spot an Abuser on Your First Date
By Frances Elizabeth
In my book "Be Careful Who You Marry" I account the controlling and abusive nature of my ex-husband. The abuse began early on in our relationship. While I began to recount when the abuse started I noticed something very unusual. The control and abuse actually began on our first date. Here is what I observed:
1. Needy Behavior: My ex-husband exhibited needy behavior immediately. During our first date he told me he missed me. He didn't know me well enough to miss me. He actually began using such words before we went out on our first date. I thought to myself this guy isn't afraid to open up and tell me his feelings. What I didn't know is that abusers will use any means necessary to gain your trust so that he can have control over you even expressing a desperate need for relationship.
2. Jealousy: As we sat and waited for our server to take our order my-ex-husband noticed a nice looking gentleman coming up behind me. I watched him walk by our table. He was dressed very well. I admired this gentleman for his well-groomed appearance. My-husband then asked if that was the kind of guy I liked. I didn't entertain the question nor did I answer it. Shortly after the server came and took our order and my ex-husband mentioned that he saw him looking at me. I was flattered that I was being noticed, but pointing out that the server was looking at me should have been a red flag. My ex was a jealous person. As the relationship progressed his jealous actions - texting me or calling me to constantly locate my whereabouts, making me dress the way he wanted me to dress, or creating situations to make me feel guilty about going places by myself, was all disguised as concern. The concern was jealousy and control.
3. Quick Commitment: My ex-husband asked me the strangest question on our first date. He asked me to be his girlfriend. He wanted me to commit to him right away. A lot of his conversation during our first date was him expressing his love for me. He used words like "you are the only one for me, it's like at first site, you are the only one who I ever talked to like this." Abusers often pressure their victims into committing to a relationship and will make you feel guilty for not doing so. After I initially turned down his offer to commit to him right away, he continued to tell me how much he loved me and could see us getting married. After a week and a half of this sort of pressure disguised as confessing his love for me I gave in. It felt like love, I really did believe that he loved me. In hindsight it was his way of controlling me.
This article is based in my personal experience with abuse and when abuse began in my relationship with ex-husband. Not all abusers give themselves away on the first date, however I do believe that abuse can be recognized early in the relationship.
By Frances Elizabeth
In my book "Be Careful Who You Marry" I account the controlling and abusive nature of my ex-husband. The abuse began early on in our relationship. While I began to recount when the abuse started I noticed something very unusual. The control and abuse actually began on our first date. Here is what I observed:
1. Needy Behavior: My ex-husband exhibited needy behavior immediately. During our first date he told me he missed me. He didn't know me well enough to miss me. He actually began using such words before we went out on our first date. I thought to myself this guy isn't afraid to open up and tell me his feelings. What I didn't know is that abusers will use any means necessary to gain your trust so that he can have control over you even expressing a desperate need for relationship.
2. Jealousy: As we sat and waited for our server to take our order my-ex-husband noticed a nice looking gentleman coming up behind me. I watched him walk by our table. He was dressed very well. I admired this gentleman for his well-groomed appearance. My-husband then asked if that was the kind of guy I liked. I didn't entertain the question nor did I answer it. Shortly after the server came and took our order and my ex-husband mentioned that he saw him looking at me. I was flattered that I was being noticed, but pointing out that the server was looking at me should have been a red flag. My ex was a jealous person. As the relationship progressed his jealous actions - texting me or calling me to constantly locate my whereabouts, making me dress the way he wanted me to dress, or creating situations to make me feel guilty about going places by myself, was all disguised as concern. The concern was jealousy and control.
3. Quick Commitment: My ex-husband asked me the strangest question on our first date. He asked me to be his girlfriend. He wanted me to commit to him right away. A lot of his conversation during our first date was him expressing his love for me. He used words like "you are the only one for me, it's like at first site, you are the only one who I ever talked to like this." Abusers often pressure their victims into committing to a relationship and will make you feel guilty for not doing so. After I initially turned down his offer to commit to him right away, he continued to tell me how much he loved me and could see us getting married. After a week and a half of this sort of pressure disguised as confessing his love for me I gave in. It felt like love, I really did believe that he loved me. In hindsight it was his way of controlling me.
This article is based in my personal experience with abuse and when abuse began in my relationship with ex-husband. Not all abusers give themselves away on the first date, however I do believe that abuse can be recognized early in the relationship.
By Frances Elizabeth
When Love Leaves Scars
By Steve L Myers
Part 1
The devil in my case never wore Prada but a tight red mini skirt. I was a restaurant manager when this woman walked into my establishment and for a brief moment it seemed as my world stopped for a moment. She was both beautiful and captivating. Once I learned she was there to apply for a job I was as happy as a child in a candy store.
Once she started working with me things in our relationship moved fast and swirled out of control in no time. Her cousin who also worked at the restaurant warned me to stay away stating her cousin had serious issues. Her mother was killed in her presence all over a guy. Within 60 days we were residing together and things were just about to get worse.
One night after having sex she asked me if I still love my wife who at the time I was separated from. When I replied with a yes and tried to explain that we had history and 3 children together. She simply went ballistic throwing a lamp and anything else that she could get her hands on. I was afraid and when I couldn't get things under control I called the police.
When the police arrived I did as most woman who are victims of domestic violence I simply lied. I sugar coated the scenario and the police left without knowing the true story. I knew she needed help and I was not going to be the one who turned his back on her. She needed help and I thought I could simply love her enough and everything would be okay.
She controlled every aspect of my life and I didn't know what to do. It wasn't long before before I couldn't call my children without getting into a fight. The police were at our apartment on a regular basis. I wanted out but there seemed to be no way to freedom. All thoughts of freedom would soon be erased when she walked in the restaurant and announced that she was pregnant. I lost my job when my boss called my home phone and heard a message that simply stated that we were both living together. If life wasn't already crazy now we were about to bring a child into this mess.
By Steve L Myers
Part 1
The devil in my case never wore Prada but a tight red mini skirt. I was a restaurant manager when this woman walked into my establishment and for a brief moment it seemed as my world stopped for a moment. She was both beautiful and captivating. Once I learned she was there to apply for a job I was as happy as a child in a candy store.
Once she started working with me things in our relationship moved fast and swirled out of control in no time. Her cousin who also worked at the restaurant warned me to stay away stating her cousin had serious issues. Her mother was killed in her presence all over a guy. Within 60 days we were residing together and things were just about to get worse.
One night after having sex she asked me if I still love my wife who at the time I was separated from. When I replied with a yes and tried to explain that we had history and 3 children together. She simply went ballistic throwing a lamp and anything else that she could get her hands on. I was afraid and when I couldn't get things under control I called the police.
When the police arrived I did as most woman who are victims of domestic violence I simply lied. I sugar coated the scenario and the police left without knowing the true story. I knew she needed help and I was not going to be the one who turned his back on her. She needed help and I thought I could simply love her enough and everything would be okay.
She controlled every aspect of my life and I didn't know what to do. It wasn't long before before I couldn't call my children without getting into a fight. The police were at our apartment on a regular basis. I wanted out but there seemed to be no way to freedom. All thoughts of freedom would soon be erased when she walked in the restaurant and announced that she was pregnant. I lost my job when my boss called my home phone and heard a message that simply stated that we were both living together. If life wasn't already crazy now we were about to bring a child into this mess.
By Steve L Myers
Tuesday, August 18, 2009
My Man Won't Commit - What Should I Do?
By Tina L. Jones
How come your man won't commit to you? Are you doing something wrong? Are you wondering if he's the right man for you after all? Commitment is such a big issue for women and yet such an important one - you don't want to waste time on a guy who has no intention of giving you the kind of relationship you're looking for. If your man won't commit, find out what you should do next.
You must understand that you can't force a guy to commit to you. If your man won't commit right now, try to understand why. Are you coming on too strong? Do you seem desperate to bag yourself a man and start having babies? Have you made it clear that you hate your job and want to be a kept woman? If you've answered yes then there's your problem right there!
The harder you push for commitment, the less likely you are to get it. If you have met the right guy and this is the right time, it won't be difficult to make that jump from just dating to an exclusive relationship. If it seems like a huge battle to you right now, then either the time isn't right, or the guy isn't the one for you.
If commitment is important to you then it is a good idea to discuss it. This way you can avoid wasting time on a man who has no intention of settling down in the next decade. Make sure you consider your own wants and needs here and not just his.
If he's not ready now, are you sure you want to hang around for a couple more years? He probably won't be ready then either, especially if he thinks he can put you off for a couple of years at a time and you'll still hang around. Consider whether he truly loves you or whether he's just using you. A lot of men will stay in a relationship they're not committed to simply because it's convenient. Don't waste the best years of your life on a guy like that.
Take him out somewhere that you can talk without being overheard and bring the subject up. Let him know that it is important to you, at this stage in your relationship, to know where he sees things going in the next year. Try not to be confrontational, this is not a war, you could be talking to your future husband here.
Make it clear to him that you love him and the life you have together and that you would like to take things to the next level to see how it works out. That's a reasonable request. If he gets freaked out by that, this guy will NEVER commit to you. If your man still won't commit after you've had a sensible, adult conversation, consider your own needs right now and be ready to move on if that's the best option.
By Tina L. Jones
How come your man won't commit to you? Are you doing something wrong? Are you wondering if he's the right man for you after all? Commitment is such a big issue for women and yet such an important one - you don't want to waste time on a guy who has no intention of giving you the kind of relationship you're looking for. If your man won't commit, find out what you should do next.
You must understand that you can't force a guy to commit to you. If your man won't commit right now, try to understand why. Are you coming on too strong? Do you seem desperate to bag yourself a man and start having babies? Have you made it clear that you hate your job and want to be a kept woman? If you've answered yes then there's your problem right there!
The harder you push for commitment, the less likely you are to get it. If you have met the right guy and this is the right time, it won't be difficult to make that jump from just dating to an exclusive relationship. If it seems like a huge battle to you right now, then either the time isn't right, or the guy isn't the one for you.
If commitment is important to you then it is a good idea to discuss it. This way you can avoid wasting time on a man who has no intention of settling down in the next decade. Make sure you consider your own wants and needs here and not just his.
If he's not ready now, are you sure you want to hang around for a couple more years? He probably won't be ready then either, especially if he thinks he can put you off for a couple of years at a time and you'll still hang around. Consider whether he truly loves you or whether he's just using you. A lot of men will stay in a relationship they're not committed to simply because it's convenient. Don't waste the best years of your life on a guy like that.
Take him out somewhere that you can talk without being overheard and bring the subject up. Let him know that it is important to you, at this stage in your relationship, to know where he sees things going in the next year. Try not to be confrontational, this is not a war, you could be talking to your future husband here.
Make it clear to him that you love him and the life you have together and that you would like to take things to the next level to see how it works out. That's a reasonable request. If he gets freaked out by that, this guy will NEVER commit to you. If your man still won't commit after you've had a sensible, adult conversation, consider your own needs right now and be ready to move on if that's the best option.
By Tina L. Jones
3 Reasons Men Won't Settle Down With Women
By Pila Fatukala
One of the many reasons women get mad at men is when men won't settle down with the women. There are men out there who always insist they are not made to be in a monogamous relationship and feel that they are destined to roam free until they are ready, not when women are ready. Often times this is really difficult for women to understand.
1. Not Enough Experimentation Many men will not settle down because they feel too young to do so. They feel they have not experienced everything they need to experience in life. Some of these experiences could be unmentioned sexual adventures and desires. Other experiences may be traveling the world. Men don't want to have the feeling that they missed out on opportunities because they settled down too early.
2. Feeling Insecurities About Themselves Men may have little insecurities about themselves preventing them from fully committing to women. They want to be able to achieve their goals and aspirations and see these things as must dos before they settle down. They want to be accomplished and successful and see settling down as an obstacle to achieving success in their lives. These men probably like women but want to have a firm foundation first before setting anything in stone.
3. Just Not Interested The last reason men won't settle down is simply because they're not interested. The connection which was there was lost or he has gotten tired of the situation. His mom may not like the woman or his friends are constantly on his case that the girlfriend is not the right one for him. The woman might not fit the mold of the person he thought he would end up with. Yet, another possibility is that he changed and the woman stayed the same. Whatever the reason may be, once the decision is made that the woman is not the one, it's over.
By Pila Fatukala
One of the many reasons women get mad at men is when men won't settle down with the women. There are men out there who always insist they are not made to be in a monogamous relationship and feel that they are destined to roam free until they are ready, not when women are ready. Often times this is really difficult for women to understand.
1. Not Enough Experimentation Many men will not settle down because they feel too young to do so. They feel they have not experienced everything they need to experience in life. Some of these experiences could be unmentioned sexual adventures and desires. Other experiences may be traveling the world. Men don't want to have the feeling that they missed out on opportunities because they settled down too early.
2. Feeling Insecurities About Themselves Men may have little insecurities about themselves preventing them from fully committing to women. They want to be able to achieve their goals and aspirations and see these things as must dos before they settle down. They want to be accomplished and successful and see settling down as an obstacle to achieving success in their lives. These men probably like women but want to have a firm foundation first before setting anything in stone.
3. Just Not Interested The last reason men won't settle down is simply because they're not interested. The connection which was there was lost or he has gotten tired of the situation. His mom may not like the woman or his friends are constantly on his case that the girlfriend is not the right one for him. The woman might not fit the mold of the person he thought he would end up with. Yet, another possibility is that he changed and the woman stayed the same. Whatever the reason may be, once the decision is made that the woman is not the one, it's over.
By Pila Fatukala
Long Distance Relationships Advice - Ways to Keep the Romance Alive From Afar
By Emeka Ezidiegwu
Despite popular misconceptions, long distance relationships are not a product of the internet age. For generations, couples have been separated from each other for many reasons - college, the military and jobs are just a few examples. Over the years, couples separated from circumstances have learned how to keep their romance alive from afar. These days, thanks to the internet and unlimited cell phone plans, it's easier than ever to stay in touch with your sweetie when you're far apart.
1. Set expectations of your relationship. The Center for the Study of Long Distance Relationships identified one key factor in successful long distance relationships. The couples in those relationships that last more than six months have talked about their expectations of the relationship. How often will you see each other? How often will you talk? What is the future?
2. Communicate frequently. Communication is the cornerstone of any relationship, and it's far more important when you're far away from your sweetheart. Take advantage of as many different types of communication as you can - telephone, email, webcam, letters - even text messages.
3. Get a low-cost telephone solution. Long gone are the days when you have to run up hundreds in phone bills just to talk to your absent partner. Do some research to find the best phone service for your relationship. Some ideas: VOIP phone service, Skype or a cell phone provider with free in-network calling. When cost isn't a factor, you can talk all night long once in a while.
4. Webcam - the next best thing to being there. A cheap webcam can let you get closer than ever to being in the same room. Webcam chats are a good way to add a visual aspect to your communication when you're far apart.
5. Get creative with your "together" time. Just because you're in different cities doesn't mean that you can't do things together. Get creative. Make a weekly date to watch a movie or favorite TV show together - over the phone.
6. Establish rituals. Rituals help establish stability in a relationship. You may not be able to kiss good night each night, but a nightly "I love you" text message just before bedtime can be a substitute that establishes expectations and a shared reality.
7. Keep living your life. Don't just sit around between contacts with your honey. Get involved in things that are important to you. Not only does it give you less time to pine, but it will also provide interesting things to share with each other when you do have time to talk.
I hope that this long distance relationships advice helps. I know that it can't replace the emptiness that most long distance participants feel, but hopefully, it sheds some lights on what to do to make it work.
P.S, Enhance your relationship and sex life: learn how to ask delicate but romantic questions that will ignite the spark and set the right mood in your relationship any time; here's the mood setting questions, romance/relationship eBook that you should read.
By Emeka Ezidiegwu
Despite popular misconceptions, long distance relationships are not a product of the internet age. For generations, couples have been separated from each other for many reasons - college, the military and jobs are just a few examples. Over the years, couples separated from circumstances have learned how to keep their romance alive from afar. These days, thanks to the internet and unlimited cell phone plans, it's easier than ever to stay in touch with your sweetie when you're far apart.
1. Set expectations of your relationship. The Center for the Study of Long Distance Relationships identified one key factor in successful long distance relationships. The couples in those relationships that last more than six months have talked about their expectations of the relationship. How often will you see each other? How often will you talk? What is the future?
2. Communicate frequently. Communication is the cornerstone of any relationship, and it's far more important when you're far away from your sweetheart. Take advantage of as many different types of communication as you can - telephone, email, webcam, letters - even text messages.
3. Get a low-cost telephone solution. Long gone are the days when you have to run up hundreds in phone bills just to talk to your absent partner. Do some research to find the best phone service for your relationship. Some ideas: VOIP phone service, Skype or a cell phone provider with free in-network calling. When cost isn't a factor, you can talk all night long once in a while.
4. Webcam - the next best thing to being there. A cheap webcam can let you get closer than ever to being in the same room. Webcam chats are a good way to add a visual aspect to your communication when you're far apart.
5. Get creative with your "together" time. Just because you're in different cities doesn't mean that you can't do things together. Get creative. Make a weekly date to watch a movie or favorite TV show together - over the phone.
6. Establish rituals. Rituals help establish stability in a relationship. You may not be able to kiss good night each night, but a nightly "I love you" text message just before bedtime can be a substitute that establishes expectations and a shared reality.
7. Keep living your life. Don't just sit around between contacts with your honey. Get involved in things that are important to you. Not only does it give you less time to pine, but it will also provide interesting things to share with each other when you do have time to talk.
I hope that this long distance relationships advice helps. I know that it can't replace the emptiness that most long distance participants feel, but hopefully, it sheds some lights on what to do to make it work.
P.S, Enhance your relationship and sex life: learn how to ask delicate but romantic questions that will ignite the spark and set the right mood in your relationship any time; here's the mood setting questions, romance/relationship eBook that you should read.
By Emeka Ezidiegwu
Monday, August 17, 2009
Would Somebody Please Explain My Husband?
By Ron R. Lee
A well-known Christian author and his wife once summed up their relationship in 13 words: "Put us together, and we add up to a fairly decent human being."
I enjoyed their self-deprecating sense of humor, and only later realized they were rephrasing a profound biblical truth: "For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh" (Genesis 2:24).
When two people become one, they compensate for each other's deficiencies. If I were left to my own devices, for instance, I'd turn into the Tom Hanks character in Cast Away. But team me up with my wife, Jeanette, the Queen of Sociability, and I turn into a reasonably presentable human being.
While we husbands benefit greatly from being married, we often don't communicate it well. Women are into relational nuances—the meaning behind the meaning behind the meaning. Men basically wonder if there are any more mashed potatoes.
One night, Jeanette and I sat quietly, enjoying ourselves in the corner of a candle-lit restaurant. Then, out of nowhere, she looked into my eyes and said, "Let's talk about our relationship." It always makes me nervous when she says that.
Relationships are usually complex, and guys are pretty basic. A husband tends to think in concrete terms. Instead of pondering his marriage, he'll picture the woman he comes home to at night, the woman with whom he has children, the woman with whom he shares his bed. Call that a relationship if you want, but you'll just confuse your husband.
What else about your husband do you wish you understood? Let me toss out seven things that might help explain a few of your husband's odd behaviors.
1 A man does more talking—and listening—when he's unaware it's happening. Most guys don't overwhelm their wife with deep inner feelings! However, there's a way to get your husband to share what's going on inside. It involves talking to him the same way his buddies do—while doing something else. Men go fishing, watch a ball game, or help each other move a pool table down to the basement. And of course, they talk a lot while they're doing these things.
For Jeanette and me, all it took was building a wood rack together. I got out the lumber and power tools; Jeanette gathered the nails, screws, and tape measure. Amid the noise and sawdust, she told me she was struggling over whether we should make a long-distance road trip to visit her parents. I'd already told her I'd do whatever she decided, but Jeanette needed to talk out the options. While we built a rack to hold our firewood, we discussed the pros and cons. What else could I do? I had to hang around until we finished the wood rack.
Take it from me. If you start doing more stuff with your husband, you'll find he actually has a lot to say. And he'll listen a lot better, too.
By Ron R. Lee
A well-known Christian author and his wife once summed up their relationship in 13 words: "Put us together, and we add up to a fairly decent human being."
I enjoyed their self-deprecating sense of humor, and only later realized they were rephrasing a profound biblical truth: "For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh" (Genesis 2:24).
When two people become one, they compensate for each other's deficiencies. If I were left to my own devices, for instance, I'd turn into the Tom Hanks character in Cast Away. But team me up with my wife, Jeanette, the Queen of Sociability, and I turn into a reasonably presentable human being.
While we husbands benefit greatly from being married, we often don't communicate it well. Women are into relational nuances—the meaning behind the meaning behind the meaning. Men basically wonder if there are any more mashed potatoes.
One night, Jeanette and I sat quietly, enjoying ourselves in the corner of a candle-lit restaurant. Then, out of nowhere, she looked into my eyes and said, "Let's talk about our relationship." It always makes me nervous when she says that.
Relationships are usually complex, and guys are pretty basic. A husband tends to think in concrete terms. Instead of pondering his marriage, he'll picture the woman he comes home to at night, the woman with whom he has children, the woman with whom he shares his bed. Call that a relationship if you want, but you'll just confuse your husband.
What else about your husband do you wish you understood? Let me toss out seven things that might help explain a few of your husband's odd behaviors.
1 A man does more talking—and listening—when he's unaware it's happening. Most guys don't overwhelm their wife with deep inner feelings! However, there's a way to get your husband to share what's going on inside. It involves talking to him the same way his buddies do—while doing something else. Men go fishing, watch a ball game, or help each other move a pool table down to the basement. And of course, they talk a lot while they're doing these things.
For Jeanette and me, all it took was building a wood rack together. I got out the lumber and power tools; Jeanette gathered the nails, screws, and tape measure. Amid the noise and sawdust, she told me she was struggling over whether we should make a long-distance road trip to visit her parents. I'd already told her I'd do whatever she decided, but Jeanette needed to talk out the options. While we built a rack to hold our firewood, we discussed the pros and cons. What else could I do? I had to hang around until we finished the wood rack.
Take it from me. If you start doing more stuff with your husband, you'll find he actually has a lot to say. And he'll listen a lot better, too.
By Ron R. Lee
Trace a Cell Phone Number - How to Nail a Cheating Spouse in Minutes
By Lauren Warner
Are you suspicious of the faithfulness of your spouse? Have they become distant? Secretive about cell phone calls? As hard as it is to face, it may be time to find out the truth. By using an online database to trace cell phone number information, you can use your spouse's cell phone logs to find out in minutes the name and address anyone they may be cheating with.
Affairs have unfortunately become all too common. Even in marriages that appear solid, there is often a chance that one of the pair is being unfaithful. Sometimes the changes happen gradually, and other times all of a sudden. If your spouse has changed and seems to have become distant and secretive, it could be a sign there is more going on than you are aware of.
Cell phones have helped cheaters gain a false sense of security. While in the past it was nearly impossible to trace cell phone number information, it has now become easy. Online technology has allowed specialized companies to buy private information from cellular carriers and include those records in large internet databases. These directories contain nearly all phone numbers, including cell and unlisted numbers. The records are kept up-to-date almost in real time so you can be assured of the most recent information.
Within a few minutes of starting your search you will have a report that will answer all your nagging questions. There is a nominal fee for these services. This is because none of the free or public reverse phone directories has access to cell phone or unlisted number information. The low cost report is well worth it for the knowledge it can give you.
To start your search you will just need to type in the phone number you would like to do a reverse lookup on. You will be told if the number is included in the directory before you are asked to pay. This way you are not charged if the information is not in the directory. You will be able to choose from a one time search, or for a few more dollars have access to as many searches as you want to do for one year. You will receive a report within seconds that will list the name and address of the phone number owner.
Don't be played by a cheating spouse. Get the information you need by using directories that trace cell phone number data quickly and easily.
By Lauren Warner
Are you suspicious of the faithfulness of your spouse? Have they become distant? Secretive about cell phone calls? As hard as it is to face, it may be time to find out the truth. By using an online database to trace cell phone number information, you can use your spouse's cell phone logs to find out in minutes the name and address anyone they may be cheating with.
Affairs have unfortunately become all too common. Even in marriages that appear solid, there is often a chance that one of the pair is being unfaithful. Sometimes the changes happen gradually, and other times all of a sudden. If your spouse has changed and seems to have become distant and secretive, it could be a sign there is more going on than you are aware of.
Cell phones have helped cheaters gain a false sense of security. While in the past it was nearly impossible to trace cell phone number information, it has now become easy. Online technology has allowed specialized companies to buy private information from cellular carriers and include those records in large internet databases. These directories contain nearly all phone numbers, including cell and unlisted numbers. The records are kept up-to-date almost in real time so you can be assured of the most recent information.
Within a few minutes of starting your search you will have a report that will answer all your nagging questions. There is a nominal fee for these services. This is because none of the free or public reverse phone directories has access to cell phone or unlisted number information. The low cost report is well worth it for the knowledge it can give you.
To start your search you will just need to type in the phone number you would like to do a reverse lookup on. You will be told if the number is included in the directory before you are asked to pay. This way you are not charged if the information is not in the directory. You will be able to choose from a one time search, or for a few more dollars have access to as many searches as you want to do for one year. You will receive a report within seconds that will list the name and address of the phone number owner.
Don't be played by a cheating spouse. Get the information you need by using directories that trace cell phone number data quickly and easily.
By Lauren Warner
Friday, August 14, 2009
The Secret to Living Long and Staying Happy
By Dena White
Have you ever noticed that happily married people seem to live longer lives? In fact, you do not have to be married, as long as you cherish and nurture the relationship you have with your significant other, you will be stronger and more satisfied in your everyday life.
Here are a few ways you can keep the magic in your relationship alive - so the two of you can live happily for many, many years!
• Communication is key! The most important element of a healthy relationship is the openness and honesty communicated between both of you. Holding in your anger or hurt feelings will only damage your relationship. Talk to your partner - and do not forget to let your partner know that you appreciate the little things they do for you. Sharing feelings and appreciation are a great part of communication.
• Cook up some love! It has been said that way to a man's heart, or a woman's heart for that matter, is through their stomach! Seduce the one you love with bananas, chocolate, cinnamon, or any other proven aphrodisiac foods. For the man who thinks the kitchen is for women only, you should be aware that several women agree that there is nothing sexier than a man cooking for her.
• Take pride in your appearance! Eating the right foods, exercising regularly, and drinking lots of water will help you stay at a healthy weight, as well as keep your skin smooth and clear, and your hair strong and healthy. Never forget about your regular hygiene and grooming habits - after all flossing helps you live longer!
• Dress to impress! Wear something special for the one you love from time to time. Ladies, try wearing a pretty dress that he bought for you, or one you know he likes, and men you know how to look good, all you have to do is try! Come on, look nice for your sweetheart!
• Make it a date! Hectic business calendars, responsibilities with the family, and errands around the house make spontaneous getaways something of a rarity. Designate one night every week as date night for you and your honey, and do not let anything stop you! Very important, you must agree not to talk about the kids, your jobs, or money while on your date.
This week, try one or two of these suggestions and keep your relationship going strong. You can also be creative and come up with some ideas on your own. There is nothing to lose, yet you have everything to gain!
By Dena White
Have you ever noticed that happily married people seem to live longer lives? In fact, you do not have to be married, as long as you cherish and nurture the relationship you have with your significant other, you will be stronger and more satisfied in your everyday life.
Here are a few ways you can keep the magic in your relationship alive - so the two of you can live happily for many, many years!
• Communication is key! The most important element of a healthy relationship is the openness and honesty communicated between both of you. Holding in your anger or hurt feelings will only damage your relationship. Talk to your partner - and do not forget to let your partner know that you appreciate the little things they do for you. Sharing feelings and appreciation are a great part of communication.
• Cook up some love! It has been said that way to a man's heart, or a woman's heart for that matter, is through their stomach! Seduce the one you love with bananas, chocolate, cinnamon, or any other proven aphrodisiac foods. For the man who thinks the kitchen is for women only, you should be aware that several women agree that there is nothing sexier than a man cooking for her.
• Take pride in your appearance! Eating the right foods, exercising regularly, and drinking lots of water will help you stay at a healthy weight, as well as keep your skin smooth and clear, and your hair strong and healthy. Never forget about your regular hygiene and grooming habits - after all flossing helps you live longer!
• Dress to impress! Wear something special for the one you love from time to time. Ladies, try wearing a pretty dress that he bought for you, or one you know he likes, and men you know how to look good, all you have to do is try! Come on, look nice for your sweetheart!
• Make it a date! Hectic business calendars, responsibilities with the family, and errands around the house make spontaneous getaways something of a rarity. Designate one night every week as date night for you and your honey, and do not let anything stop you! Very important, you must agree not to talk about the kids, your jobs, or money while on your date.
This week, try one or two of these suggestions and keep your relationship going strong. You can also be creative and come up with some ideas on your own. There is nothing to lose, yet you have everything to gain!
By Dena White
5 Things Guys Hate About Girls - Revealed
By Mark J. Hamilton
It's true that guys find girls totally cute and adorable - but we also have standards, just like you do! So below are the five things guys hate about girls, revealed. Decode the secret and find out what guys want in a girl instead:
Acting needy for attention.Some girls can be total whiners and we can't help but get annoyed when you start complaining about everything - the food, the restaurant service, your dress, your hair, your nail polish - it's making our heads hurt. You may be doing it to get our attention but honestly, it's making us less interested every second.
Nagging and being jealous.Asking a lot of questions is fine - we'd be more than happy to answer them. But asking the same questions all over again (with a tiny hint of accusation in your tone) and can send us into an overhaul and get definitely defensive to you. Learn to trust and have confidence in us. We find cool girls definitely appealing.
Making us wait. Everybody hates waiting - including you. We can not understand why you have to take hours preparing for a date - although the results are usually worth it. Being a girl is not an excuse for being tardy. Making us do so for 5 to 15 minutes is fine but hours is definitely something we should be mad about. So have a little heart. And if you really need time, prepare ahead of schedule. Life would be so much better.
Being available 24/7.Sure, we love it when we hangout. But when you launch into a text marathon and checking up on us every minute is enough to unleash the paranoia in us. Guys love a challenge and the more you show that your world evolves on us alone makes you look like you don't have other things to do - we love a woman who has a strong personality and has a life.
Expecting us to be mind readers.Saying something and mean another has been a woman's trademark. Being overtly friendly one minute and then turn into an ice queen the next is mind boggling enough. We will love it if you tell it straight to our faces that you're not fine or that something's bothering you - it's less stressful and no pressure, isn't it?
Do you think you need to know more things guys hate about girls? Are you still wondering about other things you should never tell a man? Why don't you try to discover more when it comes to how to be the perfect girlfriend by visiting my website right now! It holds all amazing techniques on how to be great and sensual with your man - you're just one click away from all the excitement!
By Mark J. Hamilton
It's true that guys find girls totally cute and adorable - but we also have standards, just like you do! So below are the five things guys hate about girls, revealed. Decode the secret and find out what guys want in a girl instead:
Acting needy for attention.Some girls can be total whiners and we can't help but get annoyed when you start complaining about everything - the food, the restaurant service, your dress, your hair, your nail polish - it's making our heads hurt. You may be doing it to get our attention but honestly, it's making us less interested every second.
Nagging and being jealous.Asking a lot of questions is fine - we'd be more than happy to answer them. But asking the same questions all over again (with a tiny hint of accusation in your tone) and can send us into an overhaul and get definitely defensive to you. Learn to trust and have confidence in us. We find cool girls definitely appealing.
Making us wait. Everybody hates waiting - including you. We can not understand why you have to take hours preparing for a date - although the results are usually worth it. Being a girl is not an excuse for being tardy. Making us do so for 5 to 15 minutes is fine but hours is definitely something we should be mad about. So have a little heart. And if you really need time, prepare ahead of schedule. Life would be so much better.
Being available 24/7.Sure, we love it when we hangout. But when you launch into a text marathon and checking up on us every minute is enough to unleash the paranoia in us. Guys love a challenge and the more you show that your world evolves on us alone makes you look like you don't have other things to do - we love a woman who has a strong personality and has a life.
Expecting us to be mind readers.Saying something and mean another has been a woman's trademark. Being overtly friendly one minute and then turn into an ice queen the next is mind boggling enough. We will love it if you tell it straight to our faces that you're not fine or that something's bothering you - it's less stressful and no pressure, isn't it?
Do you think you need to know more things guys hate about girls? Are you still wondering about other things you should never tell a man? Why don't you try to discover more when it comes to how to be the perfect girlfriend by visiting my website right now! It holds all amazing techniques on how to be great and sensual with your man - you're just one click away from all the excitement!
By Mark J. Hamilton
2 More Things That All Women Love to Hear
By CR James
Getting a woman in a sexual mood involves affecting her in many different ways.
If you want to make sure that your sexual relationship remains strong throughout the years, then you need to understand how your words affect her emotionally.
Knowing what women don't like to hear and what they do like the hear can often be the difference between a relationship that works and one that doesn't work.
As someone who has helped hundreds of men with their relationship problems, I can tell you that the degree to which you know what your woman loves to hear will be directly proportional to the amount of sex that you will experience.
So let's discuss 2 things that all women love to hear.
Thing #1: "That was a good decision"
Women love being recognized for their intellect and their wisdom. When you compliment a woman's decision you provide her with this sort of recognition.
Telling a woman that she has made a good decision lets her know that you value her beyond how she looks and beyond the way that she makes you feel. By complimenting her intelligence in some way, you are saying to her that you appreciate her depth and are as stimulated by her mind as you are her outer appeal.
Thing #2: "You turn me on."
Whether you've been together for a month or 50 years, telling a woman that you are physically attracted to her tells her that she bears a unique quality that affects you in a special way.
No matter how many years the two of you have been together, a woman always likes to hear that you think of her in an intimate way and that her mere presence excites you.
By CR James
Getting a woman in a sexual mood involves affecting her in many different ways.
If you want to make sure that your sexual relationship remains strong throughout the years, then you need to understand how your words affect her emotionally.
Knowing what women don't like to hear and what they do like the hear can often be the difference between a relationship that works and one that doesn't work.
As someone who has helped hundreds of men with their relationship problems, I can tell you that the degree to which you know what your woman loves to hear will be directly proportional to the amount of sex that you will experience.
So let's discuss 2 things that all women love to hear.
Thing #1: "That was a good decision"
Women love being recognized for their intellect and their wisdom. When you compliment a woman's decision you provide her with this sort of recognition.
Telling a woman that she has made a good decision lets her know that you value her beyond how she looks and beyond the way that she makes you feel. By complimenting her intelligence in some way, you are saying to her that you appreciate her depth and are as stimulated by her mind as you are her outer appeal.
Thing #2: "You turn me on."
Whether you've been together for a month or 50 years, telling a woman that you are physically attracted to her tells her that she bears a unique quality that affects you in a special way.
No matter how many years the two of you have been together, a woman always likes to hear that you think of her in an intimate way and that her mere presence excites you.
By CR James
Strengthen Your Relationship - Put Off Sex For a While
By Tina L. Jones
Is it a good idea to put off having sex with a new guy? Does putting off sex help or hurt your chances of taking your relationship to the next level? How long should you wait before having sex with a new partner? Sex is such an important part of a relationship and it's an important decision. There can be many consequences to sleeping with a guy that you have only just met particularly you are attracted to him emotionally and thinking of a long term relationship. Here are some things to keep in mind when deciding how long to wait before having sex.
Over recent years it has become more common for couples to have casual sex and much of the moral stigma about sex outside if marriage no longer exists. Women are a lot more comfortable with expressing their sexuality today. Having more than one partner is now acceptable for women. However that doesn't make it a good idea to sleep with every guy you are attracted to. Unless you are out to enjoy some casual sex with no expectations then you should practice a little restraint about who you sleep with.
One reason for not starting a sexual relationship too soon is that there are some guys who are just out looking to get laid. Once they have had sex they often move on. There are other guys who are might be nice guys, but they are just not ready to settle down to a serious relationship yet. By slowing things down and making a guy wait for sex you will weed out the guys who are not looking for the same thing as you. Waiting for sex also gives you time to get to know each other and develop the non-sexual side of your relationship. Getting to know him better can help you decide if the relationship is worth pursuing.
So some of the things to consider before sleeping with a guy include what your intentions are, how long you've known him and how well you know him. Sex is enjoyable and fun and no one wants you to miss out on it. But if you are after more than casual sex you will increase the chances of having a long term romance if you put off sex for a while and enjoy spending time together first.
Imagine what if you could make any man adore you, chase you, love you, and commit to you? Click Unforgettable Woman Advice and learn 77 Secrets that ninety percent of women have never heard. You have got to see this!
This article is contributed by Tina Jones. Tina is part of the Unforgettable Woman Publishing Team. She works together with founder Alexandra Fox and writes dating/relationship articles for women who want to understand male psychology, how to attract men, and find true love. You can find more about Unforgettable Woman Publishing by visiting their website
By Tina L. Jones
Is it a good idea to put off having sex with a new guy? Does putting off sex help or hurt your chances of taking your relationship to the next level? How long should you wait before having sex with a new partner? Sex is such an important part of a relationship and it's an important decision. There can be many consequences to sleeping with a guy that you have only just met particularly you are attracted to him emotionally and thinking of a long term relationship. Here are some things to keep in mind when deciding how long to wait before having sex.
Over recent years it has become more common for couples to have casual sex and much of the moral stigma about sex outside if marriage no longer exists. Women are a lot more comfortable with expressing their sexuality today. Having more than one partner is now acceptable for women. However that doesn't make it a good idea to sleep with every guy you are attracted to. Unless you are out to enjoy some casual sex with no expectations then you should practice a little restraint about who you sleep with.
One reason for not starting a sexual relationship too soon is that there are some guys who are just out looking to get laid. Once they have had sex they often move on. There are other guys who are might be nice guys, but they are just not ready to settle down to a serious relationship yet. By slowing things down and making a guy wait for sex you will weed out the guys who are not looking for the same thing as you. Waiting for sex also gives you time to get to know each other and develop the non-sexual side of your relationship. Getting to know him better can help you decide if the relationship is worth pursuing.
So some of the things to consider before sleeping with a guy include what your intentions are, how long you've known him and how well you know him. Sex is enjoyable and fun and no one wants you to miss out on it. But if you are after more than casual sex you will increase the chances of having a long term romance if you put off sex for a while and enjoy spending time together first.
Imagine what if you could make any man adore you, chase you, love you, and commit to you? Click Unforgettable Woman Advice and learn 77 Secrets that ninety percent of women have never heard. You have got to see this!
This article is contributed by Tina Jones. Tina is part of the Unforgettable Woman Publishing Team. She works together with founder Alexandra Fox and writes dating/relationship articles for women who want to understand male psychology, how to attract men, and find true love. You can find more about Unforgettable Woman Publishing by visiting their website
By Tina L. Jones
Wednesday, August 12, 2009
Too Shy With Guys? Here's How to Get Rid of the Shyness
By Tina L. Jones
Are you shy with guys? Does the thought of getting laughed at or seen as weird make you shrink? Do you try to stay away from new guys for fear that you'll just embarrass yourself? If you're shy with guys, you're missing out on quite a bit of fun!
You'll need to realize that shyness is just a manifestation of a common fear -- the fear of rejection. You're afraid of getting rejected by the men who approach you, which is why you try to make it so you won't get approached at all.
But this is hardly the way to find good guys to date! You'll be the town's best-kept secret for a long time if you avoid meeting new men. Remember that confidence is a lot sexier than looks or money, and this goes both ways in the dating game.
If you're shy with guys, then you can try conquering your shyness by hanging out with men you're not particularly attracted to. You'll realize that you won't be so shy when you don't face any risk of rejection. Talking to these men will also build your confidence over time, and will also give you an opportunity to practice your flirting skills without risk.
The best way to get rid of your shyness is to not care at all about what men think of you. If you're a confident, independent, smart woman, then you have nothing to be worried about. In fact, you'll just make men even more interested in you -- then it's up to you to choose among the worthy!
Being shy with guys isn't a bad thing -- it's STAYING shy that's the killer. Don't worry about how men will think about you, and just focus on having a good time. That's how you conquer shyness, and that's how you enjoy the dating game.
If you are looking for a system to make every man adore you, chase you, love you, and commit to you, click Unforgettable Woman Advice. If you're ready for a highly effective method that's different from what every else is teaching, click 77 Secrets to Attract and Keep Him Now. You don't want to miss this!
By Tina L. Jones
Are you shy with guys? Does the thought of getting laughed at or seen as weird make you shrink? Do you try to stay away from new guys for fear that you'll just embarrass yourself? If you're shy with guys, you're missing out on quite a bit of fun!
You'll need to realize that shyness is just a manifestation of a common fear -- the fear of rejection. You're afraid of getting rejected by the men who approach you, which is why you try to make it so you won't get approached at all.
But this is hardly the way to find good guys to date! You'll be the town's best-kept secret for a long time if you avoid meeting new men. Remember that confidence is a lot sexier than looks or money, and this goes both ways in the dating game.
If you're shy with guys, then you can try conquering your shyness by hanging out with men you're not particularly attracted to. You'll realize that you won't be so shy when you don't face any risk of rejection. Talking to these men will also build your confidence over time, and will also give you an opportunity to practice your flirting skills without risk.
The best way to get rid of your shyness is to not care at all about what men think of you. If you're a confident, independent, smart woman, then you have nothing to be worried about. In fact, you'll just make men even more interested in you -- then it's up to you to choose among the worthy!
Being shy with guys isn't a bad thing -- it's STAYING shy that's the killer. Don't worry about how men will think about you, and just focus on having a good time. That's how you conquer shyness, and that's how you enjoy the dating game.
If you are looking for a system to make every man adore you, chase you, love you, and commit to you, click Unforgettable Woman Advice. If you're ready for a highly effective method that's different from what every else is teaching, click 77 Secrets to Attract and Keep Him Now. You don't want to miss this!
By Tina L. Jones
Do Matchmaking Services Really Work?
By Eric Dashal
With the number of people online and using matchmaking services in the millions, it makes one wonder how effective the matchmaking services provided by various websites really are. With a little bit of research, it's plain to see that most services provide a very high quality of service in the form of having assorted tools to filter through and reach out to potential matches. The point though is, the success rate of people finding just the right kind of matches.
Which matchmaking sites people are hanging out at?
It would be nearly impossible for any one individual to register with and gopher through all matchmaking sites around. By going through a few websites though, it's plain to see that the more popular websites have a certain number of criterion on the basis of which people are attracted to and register for services. These characteristics include the amount of advertising a matchmaking portal does online and off. Advertising creates awareness; and, the more people that are aware of a service, the more that are likely to register for the services.
The general tendency is for people to register with multiple matchmaking sites to check them out once they are aware of the portal's existence. This enables most individuals to come to a decision on which site to concentrate their attention to. Factors that would lead to making a decision to focus on a particular matchmaking site would include search and filtration tools available, the cost of premium services and what these services would include and the quality of results that individuals come up with when running the free searches. Once people are done with pottering around at a few websites, they usually settle on using a matchmaking service that is most in sync with their particular needs.
Getting the best value
As is the case with most services, the best quality and satisfaction is normally available with matchmaking services that charge users, for their premium services. Most of the basic services include registration with the partner search site, setting up and enabling a searchable profile and using some of the search filtration tools to help with finding a suitable match.
There are a number of matchmaking websites out there that provide the complete gamut of services for free, but many individuals who're looking for a quality service would skirt these sites and choose to register with matchmaking portals that actually charge for their services. With good reason too, since its fair to reason that people who're actually serious about the entire process would want to go about their matchmaking process with the best layers of security, scrutiny and communication facilities available; and, be willing to pay for these.
The proof is in the pudding
Most matchmaking websites generally go about publishing the number of users that are registered (both paid as well as unpaid members) with the service. They also publish the number of success stories that have resulted, because of individuals making good use of the premium services. Calculating a basic ratio and comparing between sites will show a good trend - a rapidly increasing number of people being able to find their matches online. One must note here, that less than half of the people, who actually do find their match online, go about making the information public; so it's fair that matchmaking services work far better than they take credit for.
By Eric Dashal
With the number of people online and using matchmaking services in the millions, it makes one wonder how effective the matchmaking services provided by various websites really are. With a little bit of research, it's plain to see that most services provide a very high quality of service in the form of having assorted tools to filter through and reach out to potential matches. The point though is, the success rate of people finding just the right kind of matches.
Which matchmaking sites people are hanging out at?
It would be nearly impossible for any one individual to register with and gopher through all matchmaking sites around. By going through a few websites though, it's plain to see that the more popular websites have a certain number of criterion on the basis of which people are attracted to and register for services. These characteristics include the amount of advertising a matchmaking portal does online and off. Advertising creates awareness; and, the more people that are aware of a service, the more that are likely to register for the services.
The general tendency is for people to register with multiple matchmaking sites to check them out once they are aware of the portal's existence. This enables most individuals to come to a decision on which site to concentrate their attention to. Factors that would lead to making a decision to focus on a particular matchmaking site would include search and filtration tools available, the cost of premium services and what these services would include and the quality of results that individuals come up with when running the free searches. Once people are done with pottering around at a few websites, they usually settle on using a matchmaking service that is most in sync with their particular needs.
Getting the best value
As is the case with most services, the best quality and satisfaction is normally available with matchmaking services that charge users, for their premium services. Most of the basic services include registration with the partner search site, setting up and enabling a searchable profile and using some of the search filtration tools to help with finding a suitable match.
There are a number of matchmaking websites out there that provide the complete gamut of services for free, but many individuals who're looking for a quality service would skirt these sites and choose to register with matchmaking portals that actually charge for their services. With good reason too, since its fair to reason that people who're actually serious about the entire process would want to go about their matchmaking process with the best layers of security, scrutiny and communication facilities available; and, be willing to pay for these.
The proof is in the pudding
Most matchmaking websites generally go about publishing the number of users that are registered (both paid as well as unpaid members) with the service. They also publish the number of success stories that have resulted, because of individuals making good use of the premium services. Calculating a basic ratio and comparing between sites will show a good trend - a rapidly increasing number of people being able to find their matches online. One must note here, that less than half of the people, who actually do find their match online, go about making the information public; so it's fair that matchmaking services work far better than they take credit for.
By Eric Dashal
AAre You ALLERGIC to New Relationships?
By Allan Mulholland
My ex-wife used to sneeze a lot when we first met. We were both in that dizzy "I'm in love" phase that glorifies the physical attraction when two kindred souls first meet. It was a signal that the moment was right for some passionate intimacy.
I often laughed at her sudden outbursts of uncontrollable and involuntary expulsions through the nasal passages. In true wonderment, I would ask her if this was raw lust or an allergic aberration. And while I was selfishly motivated to induce these sneezing spells as often as possible, I couldn't help but wonder whether this "mood enhancer" was a permanent lust barometer or a passing passion phase. As my relationship with her matured, I developed more discerning tastes for what went into my body and what was splashed onto my body. One of the casualties of this refinement was my dependency on "Old Spice" aftershave, a habit pasted on to me by my father. Switching to "Dolce & Gabbana" miraculously cured my ex-wife of her affliction and, alas, our conjugal exploits waned significantly. Perhaps it was an allergy after all! While this romantic musing may, or may not have been indicative of an allergic reaction, there is no doubt that we all develop strong aversions to certain people or events, especially if those people or events represent situations or occurrences that have had a major negative impact on our lives. And this past exposure can cause a profound negative reaction to some future, and totally unrelated event. You may have developed an emotional allergy to new relationships.
If you are constantly self-sabotaging any attempt at forging a new relationship, it's time to deal with this allergy! Here are five steps to neutralize the allergic symptoms
1. Identify the allergens
Take a hard look at the feelings that are causing your negative reactions to your new found relationship. What are the emotional fears that prevent you from getting involved? Is it a lack of trust? A deep-rooted lack of self-esteem? A fear of making a commitment? A lack of desire? You must become fully aware of these negative feelings in order to go to Step 2.
2. Isolate the allergens
Once you've identified the negative emotions that are stopping you in your tracks, it is important to isolate them. In order to do that, take a piece of foolscap and draw a quadrant. In the top left-hand square, write down the negative emotions in their simplest terms. In the top right-hand square, write a brief description on how these emotions affect you in a real and substantive sense.
Move to the lower left-hand quarter and write down all the positive emotions you are experiencing from this new relationship. Just jot them down in point form! This is not the time to analyze these emotions! Even if you're not experiencing too many positive emotions in the moment, but feel that you could or would like to experience them, just write them down! The more positive feelings you can link to this new relationship, the more you'll have to work with!
In the last remaining square, describe the feelings that you would experience as a result of these new positive emotions. This is the time to be verbose and creative. Put effort into your descriptions and allow the feelings and passions to surface with the painter's palette of your words!
3. Negatives "be-gone" and Positives "behold".
Look at your quadrant! These are your choices! Now fold your paper along the horizontal axis. The top half represents your negative options. The bottom half delineate the positive possibilities. Which half is more densely populated? If the top half of the page is more representative of your feelings toward this new relationship, this could truly be an allergic reaction and there may be good reasons to remove yourself from the allergen
But if the bottom half is where you have the most entries, you are ready to swallow your medication and boldly run out to that meadow they call life!
So if you're ready to make your move, go to Step 4.
4. Eliminate the allergens
Actions speak louder than words. You've already written down the plusses and minuses. My guess is that you're ready to move forward! If so, eliminate the allergens! Tear your paper in half along the horizontal axis and crumple up the top half! Now throw it in the waste basket, where it belongs. For some of you this may feel a bit "over-the-top", but it is an important symbolic gesture. And you won't suffer from any drowsy side effects!
5. Aria Fresca - Fresh Air
The Italians use this term to describe not just the air quality they're breathing, but also the symbolic "cleansing" of a situation. By eliminating the toxicity of the past, you are removing the allergens that make you react in a negative way to future relationships that may lead to a Life Without Limit!
By Allan Mulholland
My ex-wife used to sneeze a lot when we first met. We were both in that dizzy "I'm in love" phase that glorifies the physical attraction when two kindred souls first meet. It was a signal that the moment was right for some passionate intimacy.
I often laughed at her sudden outbursts of uncontrollable and involuntary expulsions through the nasal passages. In true wonderment, I would ask her if this was raw lust or an allergic aberration. And while I was selfishly motivated to induce these sneezing spells as often as possible, I couldn't help but wonder whether this "mood enhancer" was a permanent lust barometer or a passing passion phase. As my relationship with her matured, I developed more discerning tastes for what went into my body and what was splashed onto my body. One of the casualties of this refinement was my dependency on "Old Spice" aftershave, a habit pasted on to me by my father. Switching to "Dolce & Gabbana" miraculously cured my ex-wife of her affliction and, alas, our conjugal exploits waned significantly. Perhaps it was an allergy after all! While this romantic musing may, or may not have been indicative of an allergic reaction, there is no doubt that we all develop strong aversions to certain people or events, especially if those people or events represent situations or occurrences that have had a major negative impact on our lives. And this past exposure can cause a profound negative reaction to some future, and totally unrelated event. You may have developed an emotional allergy to new relationships.
If you are constantly self-sabotaging any attempt at forging a new relationship, it's time to deal with this allergy! Here are five steps to neutralize the allergic symptoms
1. Identify the allergens
Take a hard look at the feelings that are causing your negative reactions to your new found relationship. What are the emotional fears that prevent you from getting involved? Is it a lack of trust? A deep-rooted lack of self-esteem? A fear of making a commitment? A lack of desire? You must become fully aware of these negative feelings in order to go to Step 2.
2. Isolate the allergens
Once you've identified the negative emotions that are stopping you in your tracks, it is important to isolate them. In order to do that, take a piece of foolscap and draw a quadrant. In the top left-hand square, write down the negative emotions in their simplest terms. In the top right-hand square, write a brief description on how these emotions affect you in a real and substantive sense.
Move to the lower left-hand quarter and write down all the positive emotions you are experiencing from this new relationship. Just jot them down in point form! This is not the time to analyze these emotions! Even if you're not experiencing too many positive emotions in the moment, but feel that you could or would like to experience them, just write them down! The more positive feelings you can link to this new relationship, the more you'll have to work with!
In the last remaining square, describe the feelings that you would experience as a result of these new positive emotions. This is the time to be verbose and creative. Put effort into your descriptions and allow the feelings and passions to surface with the painter's palette of your words!
3. Negatives "be-gone" and Positives "behold".
Look at your quadrant! These are your choices! Now fold your paper along the horizontal axis. The top half represents your negative options. The bottom half delineate the positive possibilities. Which half is more densely populated? If the top half of the page is more representative of your feelings toward this new relationship, this could truly be an allergic reaction and there may be good reasons to remove yourself from the allergen
But if the bottom half is where you have the most entries, you are ready to swallow your medication and boldly run out to that meadow they call life!
So if you're ready to make your move, go to Step 4.
4. Eliminate the allergens
Actions speak louder than words. You've already written down the plusses and minuses. My guess is that you're ready to move forward! If so, eliminate the allergens! Tear your paper in half along the horizontal axis and crumple up the top half! Now throw it in the waste basket, where it belongs. For some of you this may feel a bit "over-the-top", but it is an important symbolic gesture. And you won't suffer from any drowsy side effects!
5. Aria Fresca - Fresh Air
The Italians use this term to describe not just the air quality they're breathing, but also the symbolic "cleansing" of a situation. By eliminating the toxicity of the past, you are removing the allergens that make you react in a negative way to future relationships that may lead to a Life Without Limit!
By Allan Mulholland
Wednesday, August 5, 2009
Planning a Wedding on a Small Budget
By Adam Gaines
Planning a wedding on a small budget isn't that hard. In fact, you can have a nice inexpensive wedding for as little as $500.
Here are a few things to help you in planning a wedding on a small budget:
1. Shop around for your wedding dress at the local consignment stores or thrift stores. Purchasing a second-hand dress will alone help you save a small fortune. Or, you can simply rent your wedding dress, which is also cheap.
2. Ask your friends and family for help, and you might find out that someone has a wedding dress available or that someone is willing to accommodate your party at their home.
3. Make wedding invitations yourself.
4. Get the flowers for your wedding locally, because shipped flowers will cost you more.
5. Keep a small list of guests.
6. Have your local supermarket make your flower arrangements and cake, and no-one will even guess where they came from.
7. Organize your wedding in your backyard or in your home. You can decorate everything yourself.
8. Prepare the food yourself, and try to have light foods rather than some special courses, for instance: vegetables, finger sandwiches, a fruit plate, a cake and some snacks. You and your friends can prepare the foods a day before your wedding. Alternatively, you can purchase the cake and the food at your local grocery store.
9. If you wish, you can have your celebration in the morning, because in this case your guests will not be expecting a lot of alcohol or food.
10. Ask a few of your friends to take pictures and video. Alternatively, you may purchase some disposable cameras and leave them on the tables for the guests to take the pictures.
11. You can have the music set up on someone's laptop or mp3 player, and rent one speaker, thus you can save on the cost of the DJ services for your wedding.
12. One of the most expensive parts of a wedding is alcohol, such as expensive wines and liquor. If you want to keep the price low you can just replace those with sparkling wine or fruit punch and add a little alcohol to it. Alternatively, you may choose to have an alcohol-free wedding, which will help you save even more money and not have to worry that someone will get too drunk.
Planning a wedding on a small budget isn't hard, and can be done without much sacrificing, and make for a very special wedding day
By Adam Gaines
Planning a wedding on a small budget isn't that hard. In fact, you can have a nice inexpensive wedding for as little as $500.
Here are a few things to help you in planning a wedding on a small budget:
1. Shop around for your wedding dress at the local consignment stores or thrift stores. Purchasing a second-hand dress will alone help you save a small fortune. Or, you can simply rent your wedding dress, which is also cheap.
2. Ask your friends and family for help, and you might find out that someone has a wedding dress available or that someone is willing to accommodate your party at their home.
3. Make wedding invitations yourself.
4. Get the flowers for your wedding locally, because shipped flowers will cost you more.
5. Keep a small list of guests.
6. Have your local supermarket make your flower arrangements and cake, and no-one will even guess where they came from.
7. Organize your wedding in your backyard or in your home. You can decorate everything yourself.
8. Prepare the food yourself, and try to have light foods rather than some special courses, for instance: vegetables, finger sandwiches, a fruit plate, a cake and some snacks. You and your friends can prepare the foods a day before your wedding. Alternatively, you can purchase the cake and the food at your local grocery store.
9. If you wish, you can have your celebration in the morning, because in this case your guests will not be expecting a lot of alcohol or food.
10. Ask a few of your friends to take pictures and video. Alternatively, you may purchase some disposable cameras and leave them on the tables for the guests to take the pictures.
11. You can have the music set up on someone's laptop or mp3 player, and rent one speaker, thus you can save on the cost of the DJ services for your wedding.
12. One of the most expensive parts of a wedding is alcohol, such as expensive wines and liquor. If you want to keep the price low you can just replace those with sparkling wine or fruit punch and add a little alcohol to it. Alternatively, you may choose to have an alcohol-free wedding, which will help you save even more money and not have to worry that someone will get too drunk.
Planning a wedding on a small budget isn't hard, and can be done without much sacrificing, and make for a very special wedding day
By Adam Gaines
Wedding Planning - Where to Start!
By Gail Vince
At long last he has said those magic words 'will you marry me'. You are now engaged. The wedding date has been set. What now?
Here are a few tips to help you organize and plan your wedding to ensure nothing is forgotten or left behind.
You have been to the local newsagent and bought the latest bridal magazine. There are pages and pages of photos of beautiful wedding dresses, rings, shoes and accessories and it is full of ads on what to buy and where to buy it. There is some information on what the requirements are at a wedding but not enough for you to really get started.
Start planning your special day now, get organized instead of rushing, and have the wedding of your dreams.
Careful planning will enable you to truly enjoy every moment of your Wedding Day. Arrangements for a large conventional wedding should ideally commence between 8 - 12 months prior to the wedding date. In saying this, weddings have been planned in as little as 6 weeks and have been very successful. By using a wedding timetable (this is a list of to do's) you can follow a list of time frames to complete tasks, 12, 6, 3 and 2 months before, 6 weeks before, 2 weeks before and 1 week before the big day.
Don't forget delegation! Family and friends love to help for special occasions so use them. Bounce ideas off them, get their opinion, you don't have to act on their advice however more ideas are better than none to be able to make an informed decision.
Research and systems
When doing your research you will collect large amounts of; information, photos, samples, receipts and business cards, therefore you will need to create a system to keep all your wedding details in the one place.
It may be a ring binder with tabs for each category, or an expansion file where you are able to quickly locate information. Some of the categories may include; Wedding Dress, Men's Attire, Bridesmaid Dresses, Catering, Reception, Photography, Florist, Wedding Vehicles, Music, etc.
You could also create a scrapbook and cut images from magazines, print them off websites, insert photo's you may have taken or photo's from other peoples weddings. With a scrapbook you will be able to see how items work together to help you coordinate the theme of your wedding. Hints and tips can be noted, for example, place a disposable camera on each table (these are the shots you wouldn't normally get) and place your guests name on both sides of their name card so other guests know who is sitting at the table.
Keep a list of the most important aspects of your wedding; the venue, the entertainment and your wedding dress. When you feel you are getting bogged down with all irrelevant details, refer back to what are the most important aspects of your special day. Budget
Set a budget and stick to it! Weddings can be beautiful and fashionable without costing a fortune. By carefully budgeting, prioritizing and the assistance from family and friends you can have a wedding that is as good as any of the celebrity weddings at a third of the cost.
You may wish to open a bank account specifically for wedding expenses. This way you can keep track of all your expenses. Choose an account which offers a high interest rate on balances to get the best from your account and you may then be able to include those items that you thought you couldn't afford from the interest.
Guest List
Start by writing down all the people you know. Then start a separate list from the people on the first list who are important to you, the people who you really want to share your special day. Then continue to fine tune your list until you are at a number which is within your budget. Remember, for every name you add to your list the more money you will have to spend or you will have to do without in other areas of your planning.
The Latest Wedding Trends
Color! Color! Color! White is out, color is in!
Champagne, ivory, platinum or pink are some of the color replacing the traditional white wedding dress. By using color for the wedding dress this creates endless exciting possibilities as far as the rest of the decor goes. Colorful linen, napkins, tablecloths and chair covers, can be used to enhance the overall theme of your wedding.
By Gail Vince
At long last he has said those magic words 'will you marry me'. You are now engaged. The wedding date has been set. What now?
Here are a few tips to help you organize and plan your wedding to ensure nothing is forgotten or left behind.
You have been to the local newsagent and bought the latest bridal magazine. There are pages and pages of photos of beautiful wedding dresses, rings, shoes and accessories and it is full of ads on what to buy and where to buy it. There is some information on what the requirements are at a wedding but not enough for you to really get started.
Start planning your special day now, get organized instead of rushing, and have the wedding of your dreams.
Careful planning will enable you to truly enjoy every moment of your Wedding Day. Arrangements for a large conventional wedding should ideally commence between 8 - 12 months prior to the wedding date. In saying this, weddings have been planned in as little as 6 weeks and have been very successful. By using a wedding timetable (this is a list of to do's) you can follow a list of time frames to complete tasks, 12, 6, 3 and 2 months before, 6 weeks before, 2 weeks before and 1 week before the big day.
Don't forget delegation! Family and friends love to help for special occasions so use them. Bounce ideas off them, get their opinion, you don't have to act on their advice however more ideas are better than none to be able to make an informed decision.
Research and systems
When doing your research you will collect large amounts of; information, photos, samples, receipts and business cards, therefore you will need to create a system to keep all your wedding details in the one place.
It may be a ring binder with tabs for each category, or an expansion file where you are able to quickly locate information. Some of the categories may include; Wedding Dress, Men's Attire, Bridesmaid Dresses, Catering, Reception, Photography, Florist, Wedding Vehicles, Music, etc.
You could also create a scrapbook and cut images from magazines, print them off websites, insert photo's you may have taken or photo's from other peoples weddings. With a scrapbook you will be able to see how items work together to help you coordinate the theme of your wedding. Hints and tips can be noted, for example, place a disposable camera on each table (these are the shots you wouldn't normally get) and place your guests name on both sides of their name card so other guests know who is sitting at the table.
Keep a list of the most important aspects of your wedding; the venue, the entertainment and your wedding dress. When you feel you are getting bogged down with all irrelevant details, refer back to what are the most important aspects of your special day. Budget
Set a budget and stick to it! Weddings can be beautiful and fashionable without costing a fortune. By carefully budgeting, prioritizing and the assistance from family and friends you can have a wedding that is as good as any of the celebrity weddings at a third of the cost.
You may wish to open a bank account specifically for wedding expenses. This way you can keep track of all your expenses. Choose an account which offers a high interest rate on balances to get the best from your account and you may then be able to include those items that you thought you couldn't afford from the interest.
Guest List
Start by writing down all the people you know. Then start a separate list from the people on the first list who are important to you, the people who you really want to share your special day. Then continue to fine tune your list until you are at a number which is within your budget. Remember, for every name you add to your list the more money you will have to spend or you will have to do without in other areas of your planning.
The Latest Wedding Trends
Color! Color! Color! White is out, color is in!
Champagne, ivory, platinum or pink are some of the color replacing the traditional white wedding dress. By using color for the wedding dress this creates endless exciting possibilities as far as the rest of the decor goes. Colorful linen, napkins, tablecloths and chair covers, can be used to enhance the overall theme of your wedding.
By Gail Vince
Wedding Planning - Where to Start!
By Gail Vince
At long last he has said those magic words 'will you marry me'. You are now engaged. The wedding date has been set. What now?
Here are a few tips to help you organize and plan your wedding to ensure nothing is forgotten or left behind.
You have been to the local newsagent and bought the latest bridal magazine. There are pages and pages of photos of beautiful wedding dresses, rings, shoes and accessories and it is full of ads on what to buy and where to buy it. There is some information on what the requirements are at a wedding but not enough for you to really get started.
Start planning your special day now, get organized instead of rushing, and have the wedding of your dreams.
Careful planning will enable you to truly enjoy every moment of your Wedding Day. Arrangements for a large conventional wedding should ideally commence between 8 - 12 months prior to the wedding date. In saying this, weddings have been planned in as little as 6 weeks and have been very successful. By using a wedding timetable (this is a list of to do's) you can follow a list of time frames to complete tasks, 12, 6, 3 and 2 months before, 6 weeks before, 2 weeks before and 1 week before the big day.
Don't forget delegation! Family and friends love to help for special occasions so use them. Bounce ideas off them, get their opinion, you don't have to act on their advice however more ideas are better than none to be able to make an informed decision.
Research and systems
When doing your research you will collect large amounts of; information, photos, samples, receipts and business cards, therefore you will need to create a system to keep all your wedding details in the one place.
It may be a ring binder with tabs for each category, or an expansion file where you are able to quickly locate information. Some of the categories may include; Wedding Dress, Men's Attire, Bridesmaid Dresses, Catering, Reception, Photography, Florist, Wedding Vehicles, Music, etc.
You could also create a scrapbook and cut images from magazines, print them off websites, insert photo's you may have taken or photo's from other peoples weddings. With a scrapbook you will be able to see how items work together to help you coordinate the theme of your wedding. Hints and tips can be noted, for example, place a disposable camera on each table (these are the shots you wouldn't normally get) and place your guests name on both sides of their name card so other guests know who is sitting at the table.
Keep a list of the most important aspects of your wedding; the venue, the entertainment and your wedding dress. When you feel you are getting bogged down with all irrelevant details, refer back to what are the most important aspects of your special day. Budget
Set a budget and stick to it! Weddings can be beautiful and fashionable without costing a fortune. By carefully budgeting, prioritizing and the assistance from family and friends you can have a wedding that is as good as any of the celebrity weddings at a third of the cost.
You may wish to open a bank account specifically for wedding expenses. This way you can keep track of all your expenses. Choose an account which offers a high interest rate on balances to get the best from your account and you may then be able to include those items that you thought you couldn't afford from the interest.
Guest List
Start by writing down all the people you know. Then start a separate list from the people on the first list who are important to you, the people who you really want to share your special day. Then continue to fine tune your list until you are at a number which is within your budget. Remember, for every name you add to your list the more money you will have to spend or you will have to do without in other areas of your planning.
The Latest Wedding Trends
Color! Color! Color! White is out, color is in!
Champagne, ivory, platinum or pink are some of the color replacing the traditional white wedding dress. By using color for the wedding dress this creates endless exciting possibilities as far as the rest of the decor goes. Colorful linen, napkins, tablecloths and chair covers, can be used to enhance the overall theme of your wedding.
By Gail Vince
At long last he has said those magic words 'will you marry me'. You are now engaged. The wedding date has been set. What now?
Here are a few tips to help you organize and plan your wedding to ensure nothing is forgotten or left behind.
You have been to the local newsagent and bought the latest bridal magazine. There are pages and pages of photos of beautiful wedding dresses, rings, shoes and accessories and it is full of ads on what to buy and where to buy it. There is some information on what the requirements are at a wedding but not enough for you to really get started.
Start planning your special day now, get organized instead of rushing, and have the wedding of your dreams.
Careful planning will enable you to truly enjoy every moment of your Wedding Day. Arrangements for a large conventional wedding should ideally commence between 8 - 12 months prior to the wedding date. In saying this, weddings have been planned in as little as 6 weeks and have been very successful. By using a wedding timetable (this is a list of to do's) you can follow a list of time frames to complete tasks, 12, 6, 3 and 2 months before, 6 weeks before, 2 weeks before and 1 week before the big day.
Don't forget delegation! Family and friends love to help for special occasions so use them. Bounce ideas off them, get their opinion, you don't have to act on their advice however more ideas are better than none to be able to make an informed decision.
Research and systems
When doing your research you will collect large amounts of; information, photos, samples, receipts and business cards, therefore you will need to create a system to keep all your wedding details in the one place.
It may be a ring binder with tabs for each category, or an expansion file where you are able to quickly locate information. Some of the categories may include; Wedding Dress, Men's Attire, Bridesmaid Dresses, Catering, Reception, Photography, Florist, Wedding Vehicles, Music, etc.
You could also create a scrapbook and cut images from magazines, print them off websites, insert photo's you may have taken or photo's from other peoples weddings. With a scrapbook you will be able to see how items work together to help you coordinate the theme of your wedding. Hints and tips can be noted, for example, place a disposable camera on each table (these are the shots you wouldn't normally get) and place your guests name on both sides of their name card so other guests know who is sitting at the table.
Keep a list of the most important aspects of your wedding; the venue, the entertainment and your wedding dress. When you feel you are getting bogged down with all irrelevant details, refer back to what are the most important aspects of your special day. Budget
Set a budget and stick to it! Weddings can be beautiful and fashionable without costing a fortune. By carefully budgeting, prioritizing and the assistance from family and friends you can have a wedding that is as good as any of the celebrity weddings at a third of the cost.
You may wish to open a bank account specifically for wedding expenses. This way you can keep track of all your expenses. Choose an account which offers a high interest rate on balances to get the best from your account and you may then be able to include those items that you thought you couldn't afford from the interest.
Guest List
Start by writing down all the people you know. Then start a separate list from the people on the first list who are important to you, the people who you really want to share your special day. Then continue to fine tune your list until you are at a number which is within your budget. Remember, for every name you add to your list the more money you will have to spend or you will have to do without in other areas of your planning.
The Latest Wedding Trends
Color! Color! Color! White is out, color is in!
Champagne, ivory, platinum or pink are some of the color replacing the traditional white wedding dress. By using color for the wedding dress this creates endless exciting possibilities as far as the rest of the decor goes. Colorful linen, napkins, tablecloths and chair covers, can be used to enhance the overall theme of your wedding.
By Gail Vince
Why Should You Elope?
By Jenny Janice
Traditional wedding ceremonies are fun, no doubt about that. But they can also be tedious and difficult. So obviously, planning for a wedding is no picnic either. It will involve elaborate preparations and it will cost you a considerably large amount of money. Of course, in the name of love, you are willing to do all this and to sacrifice your time, energy, and money for something that means a lot to you and your beloved soon to be husband or wife.
But this is also one of the reasons why people elope-and one of the reasons why you should, too. Years before, eloping is frowned upon. Today, when you elope, you will no longer suffer the social stigma attached to the practice years before. As a proof, many companies and individuals offer eloping packages. This is surely a sign that there is indeed a sizable market for this service, because there are a significant number of people who elope.
So why should you elope?
You should elope when you want to marry someone without the usual frills and without spending a huge amount of money. No matter what type of elopement you do, you will still save a lot of money because usual, traditional marriages are so elaborate and expensive. The cost of the wedding ceremony alone is enough to bury a person in debt. More than the expenses for the ceremony itself, you will have to pay for the clothes you and your wedding entourage will wear and the adornments and decorations for the location of the wedding, among others. When you elope, your costs are minimal, even if you elope outside the state-or even the country.
You can also consider eloping if both your families are based very far from where you live. This is also connected to the financial side of weddings, as it is. Obviously, the only way you can have a complete ceremony is if you bring your relatives to where the ceremony will be held. And this could mean many things-you take the ceremony in a place near to both families or you shoulder a percentage of their traveling expenses. If you hold the ceremony in the location near where one's family is based, the other party will be offended. If you elope, it's only natural that no one gets invited; in the process, you don't offend or hurt anyone.
Also, you can elope if you have done the whole thing before and you wouldn't want to go through it again. People who have been married once (or more than once) may have done an elaborate wedding before. And they would not want to do it again because, as it is, a ceremony didn't really help their marriage. These are the people who thoroughly understand that it isn't about the ceremony; it is about the union of the people, it is about the people involved in the union themselves who make the marriage matter.
There are several reasons why you should consider eloping. In the end, after all, it's not the ceremony that will make or break the relationship. When you elope, you acknowledge the significance of the event.
By Jenny Janice
Traditional wedding ceremonies are fun, no doubt about that. But they can also be tedious and difficult. So obviously, planning for a wedding is no picnic either. It will involve elaborate preparations and it will cost you a considerably large amount of money. Of course, in the name of love, you are willing to do all this and to sacrifice your time, energy, and money for something that means a lot to you and your beloved soon to be husband or wife.
But this is also one of the reasons why people elope-and one of the reasons why you should, too. Years before, eloping is frowned upon. Today, when you elope, you will no longer suffer the social stigma attached to the practice years before. As a proof, many companies and individuals offer eloping packages. This is surely a sign that there is indeed a sizable market for this service, because there are a significant number of people who elope.
So why should you elope?
You should elope when you want to marry someone without the usual frills and without spending a huge amount of money. No matter what type of elopement you do, you will still save a lot of money because usual, traditional marriages are so elaborate and expensive. The cost of the wedding ceremony alone is enough to bury a person in debt. More than the expenses for the ceremony itself, you will have to pay for the clothes you and your wedding entourage will wear and the adornments and decorations for the location of the wedding, among others. When you elope, your costs are minimal, even if you elope outside the state-or even the country.
You can also consider eloping if both your families are based very far from where you live. This is also connected to the financial side of weddings, as it is. Obviously, the only way you can have a complete ceremony is if you bring your relatives to where the ceremony will be held. And this could mean many things-you take the ceremony in a place near to both families or you shoulder a percentage of their traveling expenses. If you hold the ceremony in the location near where one's family is based, the other party will be offended. If you elope, it's only natural that no one gets invited; in the process, you don't offend or hurt anyone.
Also, you can elope if you have done the whole thing before and you wouldn't want to go through it again. People who have been married once (or more than once) may have done an elaborate wedding before. And they would not want to do it again because, as it is, a ceremony didn't really help their marriage. These are the people who thoroughly understand that it isn't about the ceremony; it is about the union of the people, it is about the people involved in the union themselves who make the marriage matter.
There are several reasons why you should consider eloping. In the end, after all, it's not the ceremony that will make or break the relationship. When you elope, you acknowledge the significance of the event.
By Jenny Janice
Monday, August 3, 2009
How to Move On
By Carl Capellan
Moving on is hard to do. It's inexplicably tough especially when you're holding on to somebody and you can't just let go of the feelings for that person. It's even unbearable if it's a case of reciprocated love.
Channeling your energies to other worthwhile activities was the unanimous advice I've heard from my friends. One must need to divert their attention away from the source of the heartache. This is easier said than done. Can you turn your eyes away from the person the knocks you off your feet? Can you refrain from thinking of the person that makes you smile? Can you stop your ears from hearing his voice? Can you cease your breathing every time that person passes by so that you cannot smell his intoxicating scent? Its just like subjecting yourself into an unbearable agony, a suffering that you need to go through everyday of your life. How can you escape from this wretched existence then?
I believe that moving on starts with acceptance. For failed relationships, moving on begins with accepting the fact that it's over. For unrequited love, it starts with recognizing the fact that you're not for each other. Thinking that somebody better is meant for you is a healthy way of dealing with rejection. Acceptance starts when anguish ends. Moreover, acceptance paves the way for the healing process to commence.
Moving on also means letting go of your broken dreams and shattered illusions. When you're in love with a person, you can't help but plan your future with them. You see yourself doing things together, even to the point of growing old together. I think this a big factor why most people find it hard to let go. I feel for this people I because share the same sentiments with them.
Moving on also means emancipation from false hopes. Just because your crush smiled at you doesn't necessarily mean that he likes you too. Just because your ex texted you doesn't automatically mean that he wants you back. It's better not to jump into conclusions to avoid hurting yourself in the long run. We tend to do this when we are in love. We make a big deal out of simple gestures, especially of those were from the ones we love. I must admit I am guilty of this.
Moving on involves prayer. You ask the Lord to relieve your heart from the turbulence it feels and ask Him to give you wisdom to understand without questioning His divine plan for you. Prayer eases one's burden and clears one's mind. So in times of despair, talk to the Lord and meditate.
Everything has a beginning and an end. Love is no exception. Moving on was never easy. Lucky is he who has perfected the art of letting go. It takes time. It is a long and often a painful process. It entails a roller coaster of emotions that we need to overcome. This makes the whole experience more human. Only when we know how it feels to let go can we fully understand and appreciate how it is to love and be loved.
By Carl Capellan
Moving on is hard to do. It's inexplicably tough especially when you're holding on to somebody and you can't just let go of the feelings for that person. It's even unbearable if it's a case of reciprocated love.
Channeling your energies to other worthwhile activities was the unanimous advice I've heard from my friends. One must need to divert their attention away from the source of the heartache. This is easier said than done. Can you turn your eyes away from the person the knocks you off your feet? Can you refrain from thinking of the person that makes you smile? Can you stop your ears from hearing his voice? Can you cease your breathing every time that person passes by so that you cannot smell his intoxicating scent? Its just like subjecting yourself into an unbearable agony, a suffering that you need to go through everyday of your life. How can you escape from this wretched existence then?
I believe that moving on starts with acceptance. For failed relationships, moving on begins with accepting the fact that it's over. For unrequited love, it starts with recognizing the fact that you're not for each other. Thinking that somebody better is meant for you is a healthy way of dealing with rejection. Acceptance starts when anguish ends. Moreover, acceptance paves the way for the healing process to commence.
Moving on also means letting go of your broken dreams and shattered illusions. When you're in love with a person, you can't help but plan your future with them. You see yourself doing things together, even to the point of growing old together. I think this a big factor why most people find it hard to let go. I feel for this people I because share the same sentiments with them.
Moving on also means emancipation from false hopes. Just because your crush smiled at you doesn't necessarily mean that he likes you too. Just because your ex texted you doesn't automatically mean that he wants you back. It's better not to jump into conclusions to avoid hurting yourself in the long run. We tend to do this when we are in love. We make a big deal out of simple gestures, especially of those were from the ones we love. I must admit I am guilty of this.
Moving on involves prayer. You ask the Lord to relieve your heart from the turbulence it feels and ask Him to give you wisdom to understand without questioning His divine plan for you. Prayer eases one's burden and clears one's mind. So in times of despair, talk to the Lord and meditate.
Everything has a beginning and an end. Love is no exception. Moving on was never easy. Lucky is he who has perfected the art of letting go. It takes time. It is a long and often a painful process. It entails a roller coaster of emotions that we need to overcome. This makes the whole experience more human. Only when we know how it feels to let go can we fully understand and appreciate how it is to love and be loved.
By Carl Capellan
Should You Really Make Your Man Wait For Sex?
By Tina L. Jones
Is it really a good idea to make your man wait for sex? Have you ever wondered when it is ok to have sex? How long should you wait in your relationship before having sex? Women all find it really difficult to understand male psychology and how long they should wait before they have sex with a man.
Understanding how to make your man wait for sex can make your relationship much longer lasting. This can be very confusing to understand how long you should make your man wait for sex. There isn't actually any right or wrong answer. If you are looking for a quick casual relationship then it can be great fun to have sex as early as possible. However if you are after a committed relationship then you must wait for your relationship to develop much slower.
Making your guy wait for sex might be a fantastic opportunity for your relationship to improve. This is because men don't associate sex and emotions with one another. Sex is often just seen as a need rather than an emotional feeling. Women think the complete opposite and this is because sex is linked with emotions. Women can get confused when they have sex with a guy and realize that he doesn't feel the same way about them.
Women have a close relationship between their emotions and sex. As soon as they sleep with a man they connect strong emotions to them and this can cause problems if he doesn't feel the same. It can be helpful for you to wait for sex with a guy so that you can improve your relationship. Sex can cloud a mans judgment and he might star to see you as a casual fling rather than a serious contender for a serious relationship. It's important that you don't let him have sex straight away because if you do he will start to think of you as a fling.
It's better if you can build your relationship on a solid foundation. To do this you should start out as friends. Starting out as friends gives you both a chance to get to know each other and this will only do your relationship good. You must make him wait for sex if you want to stand any chance of your relationship surviving. Now you should know that if you make your man wait for sex you can strengthen your relationship.
By Tina L. Jones
Is it really a good idea to make your man wait for sex? Have you ever wondered when it is ok to have sex? How long should you wait in your relationship before having sex? Women all find it really difficult to understand male psychology and how long they should wait before they have sex with a man.
Understanding how to make your man wait for sex can make your relationship much longer lasting. This can be very confusing to understand how long you should make your man wait for sex. There isn't actually any right or wrong answer. If you are looking for a quick casual relationship then it can be great fun to have sex as early as possible. However if you are after a committed relationship then you must wait for your relationship to develop much slower.
Making your guy wait for sex might be a fantastic opportunity for your relationship to improve. This is because men don't associate sex and emotions with one another. Sex is often just seen as a need rather than an emotional feeling. Women think the complete opposite and this is because sex is linked with emotions. Women can get confused when they have sex with a guy and realize that he doesn't feel the same way about them.
Women have a close relationship between their emotions and sex. As soon as they sleep with a man they connect strong emotions to them and this can cause problems if he doesn't feel the same. It can be helpful for you to wait for sex with a guy so that you can improve your relationship. Sex can cloud a mans judgment and he might star to see you as a casual fling rather than a serious contender for a serious relationship. It's important that you don't let him have sex straight away because if you do he will start to think of you as a fling.
It's better if you can build your relationship on a solid foundation. To do this you should start out as friends. Starting out as friends gives you both a chance to get to know each other and this will only do your relationship good. You must make him wait for sex if you want to stand any chance of your relationship surviving. Now you should know that if you make your man wait for sex you can strengthen your relationship.
By Tina L. Jones
The Symbolic Meaning of the Engagement Ring
By Jeff Glasser
In the United States, as well as many other countries, an engagement ring is worn on the fourth finger of the left hand. This tradition is thought to be from the Romans, who believed this finger to be the beginning of the "vein of love," the vein that leads to the heart. They are promise rings. They are the promise of commitment and of things to come.
The ring is a symbol of two peoples love and obligation towards each other. It is an important time in the couple's lives and therefore choosing that perfect ring is the first step towards building a life together and therefore a lot of emphasis is placed on getting it right. It is a representation of your love and dedication and hence an extremely important piece of jewelry. The classic engagement ring is composed of two parts: a diamond and a setting. For the best value, find the ring setting she will love, then devote the remainder of your budget to a beautiful, certified diamond.
Diamonds are used the in most settings, mainly because of their durability and strength. These qualities are meant to symbolize the relationship, so the diamond is usually the centerpiece of the ring's setting. Diamonds are the best of all jewelry stones available to the serious jewelry buyer.
Platinum has become the new "it" metal for engagement rings, but it comes with a hefty price tag. Fortunately, there are plenty of metals on the market that are still beautiful, elegant and less expensive. Designer rings are always more expensive because they offer you the quality that comes with their name as well as a lifetime guarantee. You can find ready made rings in almost every jewelry store or you can custom make one to match your requirements, special design and budget.
In the United States, as well as many other countries, an engagement ring is worn on the fourth finger of the left hand. This tradition is thought to be from the Romans, who believed this finger to be the beginning of the "vein of love," the vein that leads to the heart. They are promise rings. They are the promise of commitment and of things to come
By Jeff Glasser
In the United States, as well as many other countries, an engagement ring is worn on the fourth finger of the left hand. This tradition is thought to be from the Romans, who believed this finger to be the beginning of the "vein of love," the vein that leads to the heart. They are promise rings. They are the promise of commitment and of things to come.
The ring is a symbol of two peoples love and obligation towards each other. It is an important time in the couple's lives and therefore choosing that perfect ring is the first step towards building a life together and therefore a lot of emphasis is placed on getting it right. It is a representation of your love and dedication and hence an extremely important piece of jewelry. The classic engagement ring is composed of two parts: a diamond and a setting. For the best value, find the ring setting she will love, then devote the remainder of your budget to a beautiful, certified diamond.
Diamonds are used the in most settings, mainly because of their durability and strength. These qualities are meant to symbolize the relationship, so the diamond is usually the centerpiece of the ring's setting. Diamonds are the best of all jewelry stones available to the serious jewelry buyer.
Platinum has become the new "it" metal for engagement rings, but it comes with a hefty price tag. Fortunately, there are plenty of metals on the market that are still beautiful, elegant and less expensive. Designer rings are always more expensive because they offer you the quality that comes with their name as well as a lifetime guarantee. You can find ready made rings in almost every jewelry store or you can custom make one to match your requirements, special design and budget.
In the United States, as well as many other countries, an engagement ring is worn on the fourth finger of the left hand. This tradition is thought to be from the Romans, who believed this finger to be the beginning of the "vein of love," the vein that leads to the heart. They are promise rings. They are the promise of commitment and of things to come
By Jeff Glasser
Is Courtship Necessary?
By Joseph Ene
Courtship is a period when someone is trying to win love of another person. Courtship can be regarded as a period when two people who have agreed to marry get acquainted with each other. In this case, approval or consent has been given by the one being courted to the one courting, that is, they are already engaged.
It is better to court before marriage. This is because:
1. Both of you are from different background. There is need to spend time, some months before your wedding to know some things about each other.
2. Courtship allows for adjustments to some of each other's likes and dislikes or tribal differences that will help your marriage to succeed in future.
3. It is the foundation on which every marriage is built. The way most couples live after wedding reflects the way they courted.
4. It affords you an opportunity to further confirm your conviction about the person you want to marry. You may discover that you were not led by God after all but were carried away by mere infatuation or charm. A broken engagement is better than a broken marriage.
5. Lack of proper courtship has made a lot of couples who were brought together by God to be unhappy in their homes.
6. It is approved by God. The case of Mary and Joseph was stated in the Holy Bible to show us that courtship is biblical.
It is therefore good to court before marriage because a fruitful courtship is the one that leads to wedding and followed by a fruitful and happy marriage
By Joseph Ene
Courtship is a period when someone is trying to win love of another person. Courtship can be regarded as a period when two people who have agreed to marry get acquainted with each other. In this case, approval or consent has been given by the one being courted to the one courting, that is, they are already engaged.
It is better to court before marriage. This is because:
1. Both of you are from different background. There is need to spend time, some months before your wedding to know some things about each other.
2. Courtship allows for adjustments to some of each other's likes and dislikes or tribal differences that will help your marriage to succeed in future.
3. It is the foundation on which every marriage is built. The way most couples live after wedding reflects the way they courted.
4. It affords you an opportunity to further confirm your conviction about the person you want to marry. You may discover that you were not led by God after all but were carried away by mere infatuation or charm. A broken engagement is better than a broken marriage.
5. Lack of proper courtship has made a lot of couples who were brought together by God to be unhappy in their homes.
6. It is approved by God. The case of Mary and Joseph was stated in the Holy Bible to show us that courtship is biblical.
It is therefore good to court before marriage because a fruitful courtship is the one that leads to wedding and followed by a fruitful and happy marriage
By Joseph Ene
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